Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Mar 03, 2009, 06:35 PM
justfloating's Avatar
justfloating justfloating is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jan 2009
Location: Scotland/Canada
Posts: 1,502
I don't want to talk about it. I'm going to see my counsellor tomorrow and get it all out because it's complicated. But I've simultaneously managed to get my heart broken, completely humiliate myself, screw up one of the best friendships I've ever had, and realized just how worthless I really am. I've basically been told "I love you but not enough to want to make the slightest sacrifice for you, but thanks for offering me the world anyways." I'm angry and humiliated and sad and confused and I can't stop thinking about the pills in my bathroom. I'm trying to distract myself. I've been doing so much better. I haven't felt suicidal in a long time. Just this afternoon I was telling my counsellor how much better I've been feeling, and then this happens, and now the horrible thoughts are back and it's terrifying and I just want to curl up in a ball and cry...

Hugs would be nice. I feel so alone. I can't believe what an idiot I've been.
__________________
Rebecca

"If you're going through hell -- keep going."
- Winston Churchill


It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.
- Elizabeth Gilbert

Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong,
we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on.
Bring on the wonder, bring on the song,
I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long.
- Susan Enan


http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/

advertisement
  #2  
Old Mar 03, 2009, 06:46 PM
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,641
(((((((((((((((( justfloating ))))))))))))))))
__________________
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #3  
Old Mar 03, 2009, 07:01 PM
gimmeice's Avatar
gimmeice gimmeice is offline
Elder
 
Member Since: Mar 2008
Location: Indiana
Posts: 7,416
((((((((((((( justfloating )))))))))))))))))
__________________

hugs?

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis

visit my blog at http://gimmeice.psychcentral.net
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #4  
Old Mar 03, 2009, 07:03 PM
lmg103's Avatar
lmg103 lmg103 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Nov 2008
Posts: 206
((((((((((Justfloating))))))))))
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #5  
Old Mar 03, 2009, 08:12 PM
Polperro's Avatar
Polperro Polperro is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: Southwest, UK
Posts: 2,611
(((( Justfloating )))),
I want to pick on something you said: "realized just how worthless I really am."

You are not worthless ....... there are people out that care about you and i'm certain there are people you care about

One things for sure there are certainly people on this site that care .......

I am for one so are fuzzybear, gimmeice and img103.

So please hold onto that thought and be safe.
Polperro
__________________
CHRISTMAS - Choose hope, reach inside see the most amazing surprize.
Pegasus March 2009
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #6  
Old Mar 03, 2009, 10:17 PM
brephi's Avatar
brephi brephi is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2008
Location: Midwest
Posts: 161
Quote:
Originally Posted by justfloating View Post
I don't want to talk about it. I'm going to see my counsellor tomorrow and get it all out because it's complicated. But I've simultaneously managed to get my heart broken, completely humiliate myself, screw up one of the best friendships I've ever had, and realized just how worthless I really am. I've basically been told "I love you but not enough to want to make the slightest sacrifice for you, but thanks for offering me the world anyways." I'm angry and humiliated and sad and confused and I can't stop thinking about the pills in my bathroom. I'm trying to distract myself. I've been doing so much better. I haven't felt suicidal in a long time. Just this afternoon I was telling my counsellor how much better I've been feeling, and then this happens, and now the horrible thoughts are back and it's terrifying and I just want to curl up in a ball and cry...

Hugs would be nice. I feel so alone. I can't believe what an idiot I've been.
LOTS OF TO YOU AND . WE HAVE TO HOPE THAT EVERYTHING WILL GET BETTER. YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON AND DESERVE TO BE HAPPY. HANG IN THERE AND DISCUSS EVERYTHING WITH YOU COUNSELOR SO YOU CAN GET NEEDED HELP.
__________________

brephi
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #7  
Old Mar 04, 2009, 07:07 AM
yutzman's Avatar
yutzman yutzman is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2008
Location: Taneytown, MD.
Posts: 390
justfloating, I don't believe in "hugs". But I do believe in what people say in their quotes............So what did Winston Churchill say?...........
Don't feel so alone.....Geez I hate that word 'alone'.....
That is why I come to PC.............we can be 'alone' together.
__________________
And if your head explodes with dark forbodings too...I'll see you on the darkside of the moon......
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #8  
Old Mar 04, 2009, 07:56 AM
madisgram's Avatar
madisgram madisgram is offline
Elder
 
Member Since: Nov 2008
Location: Sunny East Coast Florida!
Posts: 6,873
(((JF))) glad u're going to talk about this with your couselor. triggers can cause us to revert back to things that make us feel worthless because we've still got an "old tape" running in the background. keep us posted on how u are doing and i hope you and your counselor can get to the root of the false belief that you are worthless. i know you are of value and worth.
you just need to reclaim the truth about yourself regardless of what is going on in your life.some hugs for you, hope u feel better soon...
__________________
Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #9  
Old Mar 04, 2009, 08:28 AM
Anonymous091825
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
(((justfloating)))))))))))))You are not worthless as everyone said.
You've been dealt some blows that i am sure hurt.
Talking to you T is a very good idea
calling them back if you need to
remember you are a good person.
hope you feel better and get the help
sending caring thoughts your way
Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #10  
Old Mar 04, 2009, 09:39 AM
lindee's Avatar
lindee lindee is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Illinois
Posts: 161
((((((((((justfloating))))))))))

Thanks for this!
justfloating
  #11  
Old Mar 04, 2009, 04:22 PM
justfloating's Avatar
justfloating justfloating is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jan 2009
Location: Scotland/Canada
Posts: 1,502
Thanks, all. I always feel so much better after posting here, everyone is so supportive.

I'm taking things a day at a time. Things are still a little rocky, but I'm gonna get rid of those nasty old tapes if it's the last thing I do!!
__________________
Rebecca

"If you're going through hell -- keep going."
- Winston Churchill


It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.
- Elizabeth Gilbert

Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong,
we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on.
Bring on the wonder, bring on the song,
I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long.
- Susan Enan


http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/
Reply
Views: 829

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:00 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.