[melmac]

Alot of my life seems like a book that i have read. Some days it's hard to comprehend that I am who I am. Sometimes certain things hit me as if I just found out that I am who I am and that I have children and a husband. It's very overwhelming to me. Then it goes away. It's more of a feeling from someone else. Does anyone relate?

[Kathyanita]

depersonalization and derealization are not uncommon experiences of dissociative disorders.
I've had the huge moments like your saying and also the small ebarassing moments. . .like the time in the grocery store when I was filling this guys cart with stuff because he looked enough like my husband- who was in another isle- I mean i had a basic knowledge that i was with the guy with the dark hair and beard so . . . anyway it was not a big arrestable offense to contribute unwanted items to the other guys cart- probably thought I was hitting on him.

[Miss_A]

Yup I can relate to what your saying. Though I kind of try to look at my life like a story. Also write in a diary too. Do you have a diary?

[(JD)]

What might be hard for ppl with dissociative issues is to realize that many of these things happen to ppl who are NOT dissociative, too! Don't focus on it, if you can help it, and try to look at things as part of life, not things that are only happening, feeling that way, to you.

i relate to your experiences. i was driving to a friend's house this morning and didn't recognize anything!! someone was giving me directions as if it was the first time i went there. things actually got better once on her road. she is a very grounding friend and being with her was good medicine. she doesn't k now i have DID---but that's ok, she just thinks i am goofy sometimes and serious and contemplative other times. gotta love her.
i agree with sky that "normal" people get "ditzed" out. i am trying to follow the advice of go with the flow and laugh at some of the stuff. oh well.
wi

[Kathyanita]

of course we all understand that MY reply was from the perspective of dissociation as this question was brought to this forum. . .I'm in no way jealous or possesive of these symptoms which do in fact attend many other dx and also stand as dx themselves according to DSM IV.

[(JD)]

NP kathyanita.. me too.. I have ptsd from a tragic accident that left me disabled and from that tend to become dissociated (unreal...derealization) and also full blown flashbacks of the accident/thunderstorming etc...

But we all dissociate in life... it's a built in response, not just to trauma, but to boredom. Everyone experiences driving/going somewhere and realizing once there, they didn't see the surroundings along the way but was deep in thought.

[Kathyanita]

i got it. boredom however is the laest of my problems
once you get to be a vurtuoso at dissociating for survival you cant really turn it off with out great tremendous effort . i WISH i could remember finding living boring as a child - thats just me thought i know about highway hypnosis too.

I listen to Talking Heads when things get wiggy on me as their lyrics seem to be these moments in our lives.

partial lyrics from Once In A Lifetime
Talking Heads Remain In Light
sire records

And you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
And you may find yourself in another part of the world
And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful
wife
And you may ask yourself-Well...How did I get here?

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.

And you may ask yourself
How do I work this?
And you may ask yourself
Where is that large automobile?
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house!
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful wife!
<snip>
And you may ask yourself
What is that beautiful house?
And you may ask yourself
Where does that highway go?
And you may ask yourself
Am I right?...Am I wrong?
And you may tell yourself
MY GOD!...WHAT HAVE I DONE?