[Bmee2]

Trust...losing a T finding a new T. remember not the other topics mentioned in a chat tonight. Not prepared for such touchy sensitive subject. many conversations at once. Hard to focus.
Cry.
Why why the tears? Thoughts so fast can barely type them. Lost
Afraid...abandoned...hide...do not show fear. Everything is okay. Need to prepare slow down thinking...going to be sick. Subject of T....triggering must be....understand...no one knows us...no here long enough to be known. Take control...be in charge of not healthy behavior...it is possible...but really there is no one to help us...find a T that no leave us...trust? believe will be abandoned...even if work really hard not to make mistakes. Annoy other people with self doubt. remain silent about those thoughts. Instruction is wanted but thus far no instructors have been located. No money either to pay instructors to teach how to live happier. People tired of on-going unhappiness. fake happiness...hide unhappiness...it makes no sense why the SI always seemed so happy.
Not really. Never knew me. Never knew of the internal raging fire, the blistering beneath the skin, the wrecking crane in the brain. Not good enough...misunderstood. Try...hang on...hold on....breathe...it can be done. read more...exercise more...take better care of self...be determined. Do it.

[Hunny]

Bmee2

my heart goes out to you
singing and hoping you find some soothing music that comforts you
saw you being so brave and tried to be brave too
would like to you float to calmer thoughts and feeling but don't know how to help you, except to listen/read
safe cyber-hugs and
safe group-hugs and then most of all that you come back a have nice soft, gentle, calming thoughts and rest.

Originally Posted by Bmee2

Trust...losing a T finding a new T. remember not the other topics mentioned in a chat tonight. Not prepared for such touchy sensitive subject. many conversations at once. Hard to focus.
Cry.
Why why the tears? Thoughts so fast can barely type them. Lost
Afraid...abandoned...hide...do not show fear. Everything is okay. Need to prepare slow down thinking...going to be sick. Subject of T....triggering must be....understand...no one knows us...no here long enough to be known. Take control...be in charge of not healthy behavior...it is possible...but really there is no one to help us...find a T that no leave us...trust? believe will be abandoned...even if work really hard not to make mistakes. Annoy other people with self doubt. remain silent about those thoughts. Instruction is wanted but thus far no instructors have been located. No money either to pay instructors to teach how to live happier. People tired of on-going unhappiness. fake happiness...hide unhappiness...it makes no sense why the SI always seemed so happy.
Not really. Never knew me. Never knew of the internal raging fire, the blistering beneath the skin, the wrecking crane in the brain. Not good enough...misunderstood. Try...hang on...hold on....breathe...it can be done. read more...exercise more...take better care of self...be determined. Do it.

[kasva]

hi bmee........i just want you to know that im listening to you and i care.im sorry you are having such a hard time. hugs if okay.....kasva

[invisigirl]

hugs and love to you, friend.

[krazy_phoenix]

we are listening...

[Bmee2]

i have a couple of names for doctors that may help. i have to find time to contact them. i also may have a place that does art therapy and that would be a lot of fun...i like art a lot. So....i am working on stuff. i am even working on getting a new insulin pump...for the diabetes. Thank you all for listening. Pdoc and i are talking too about the loss of first T. First T left her too. So some processing has started.

TTFN- ta ta for now