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#1
Dec 05, 2005, 09:05 PM
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I am feeling so dirty right now... I take long hot baths with bleech. I try to cleanse myself, I feel so ashamed, unclean and unloved.
Lilith 
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#2
Dec 05, 2005, 09:10 PM
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Oh sweetie PLEASE don't use bleach it can harm you and you don't deserve to be harmed more...you are not dirty inside or out.....I understand you FEEL, that way but you arent ,...do you have a T you can call???
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#3
Dec 05, 2005, 09:15 PM
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Sleeps is right, you don't need to harm yourself.
You did nothing wrong, Lilith.  You are a caring, kind person and we care about you. Please call your T if you have one, or keep posting here with us. Petunia |
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#4
Dec 05, 2005, 09:18 PM
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I have bathed in bleech for over 30 years. First I cut/scratch then I bath.. somedays that is the only thing I can feel.. I told my new T. this. My old T tried to make me do a safety contract... my new T. has not asked me to do that yet.
Lilith
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#5
Dec 05, 2005, 09:22 PM
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I do understand the need to feel.
I'm sorry you have to do this to feel clean. (((( safe hugs )))) Petunia |
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#6
Dec 05, 2005, 09:32 PM
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(((((((((((((((((lilith)))))))))))))))))))))
I'm sorry. Please try to contact you t ASAP. We're here. We care. KD
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#7
Dec 05, 2005, 09:43 PM
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I'm sorry you don't feel pretty and clean and nice like I'm sure you are!
 You have to keep telling yourself that you are ...even though you don't really believe it.. you have to keep saying it (but if you keep saying you are not clean, that is what your brain will think and remember and that isn't good, is it?) You ARE clean and nice Lili (I'm not going to call you Lilith because you are not that! OK?) I like "Lili " nice and pure ((((Lili)))) that's what you are! 
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#8
Dec 06, 2005, 12:33 AM
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Sweetie Sweetie Sweetie
Cuts and bleach?? Ow Ow Ow My heart cries out with your pain. Please put a call in to your t. If you need to add a cleaning agent to your bathwater, vinegar would be a good thing to try. It's actually good for skin and private parts in a dilute solutiion. Take care, Lilith, take care. (PS Sky just snuck in a bible thump : ), I love your name.)
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#9
Dec 06, 2005, 04:48 PM
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Lilith,
Please be kind to your little body. Soft things will make it feel better. All the girls
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 good things come to those who wait, and wait and wait |
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#10
Dec 06, 2005, 07:55 PM
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Have you checked up on OCD? I am sorry for your pain. I wish you help, I wish you will feel better.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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