[Lexi232]

How do i stay out!? i dont want to really go back in, i dont know when i can come bak out!! i want to stay!! how do i do it!? how i dont know how!! Please!!
why does she get the say?!! why cant i say!? i want to STAY OUT!!!!

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Lexi232

How do i stay out!? i dont want to really go back in, i dont know when i can come bak out!! i want to stay!! how do i do it!? how i dont know how!! Please!!
why does she get the say?!! why cant i say!? i want to STAY OUT!!!!

some peoples parts / alters stay out longer than others even within the same system. everyone's system is how ever its meant to be.

talk with your treatment providers and your host. maybe you all can come to some sort of agreement so that you all are able to have the time out that you need.

[pegasus]

I'm not sure how anyone gets that much control where they can determine which part stays out. Perhaps find things that the part likes to do so that they feel safe enough to stay out for longer. Hugs (((((((( Lexi )))))))))

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by pegasus

I'm not sure how anyone gets that much control where they can determine which part stays out. Perhaps find things that the part likes to do so that they feel safe enough to stay out for longer. Hugs (((((((( Lexi )))))))))

some people with DID can obtain the amount of control where they or their treatment providers are able to control who comes out and stays out. example I know some psychiatrists / therapists and the clients have in situations where it was imperative that an alter was to remain in control as a way to prevent the host and other alters from committing suicide, or to prevent child alters from suddenly taking control while the host was operating a vehicle and other safety hazards.

some clients and their treatment providers are also able to "call out" an alter.

with me some of my alters had remained in control sometimes for yrs. I would become aware in unfamiliar places and upon trying to put the events in order I discovered sometimes those alters had been in control for days, months and yrs at a time.

I know someone who has meetings / conferences with their alters. they decide the night before what the following days plans are and which alters need to stay in the "childrens play zone" and which adults will handle which activity.

each persons system is set up according to what that person needed to survive. some systems are set up so that there is communication, co consciousness that enables everyone to work together making decisions, including who comes out when.

for some people having this level of control never happens, some people gain control through yrs of therapy and for others they have more control from the start. it all depends upon what each person needed in order to survive, what their system is like and what kinds of purposes and jobs their alters have.

Also The diagnostics say a person with DID has to have at least two alters that take control where the host has no control over what happens. it doessnt say *every* alter in the system cannot be accessed by the host for decision making, planning the daily schedule and events. the minimum is 2. A person can have say 15 alters and only two of them the host has no control over and still be DID.

[Lexi232]

we got not treatment plan. we have T but not about this. we kept quiet. we spoke some but got all difrent kind of reashons. we know we got more than 2. and for all i know abbi is the one who got the controls cause she forces mary out at bad times. but we dont know how.

[blossommayflower27]

Lexi...is there a reason no one feels comfortable with talking to your T about this???when you get the chance try at least attempt to bring out the issue with your T...or are you not comfortable with her...let us know either way...Remember we all do care!!!and want the best for you...

[Lexi232]

Our T.. I do not have much memory of her, but they are talking with her, over getting us out and into safty. we can't come out with this now. it would only make things worse for us.
and instead of having antifreeze slipped in our food, we would be stuck at having excerssims done on us again as it were when we were tiny. our parents think it is evil, and demonic. and that we are demon possessed, and..... thats how they feel over everyone who is with DID... it is not true.. cause I know it.. but.. i've been through more than four excerssismes and i do NOT wish to go through more.

why is it we get cold and so tired when we come out? we have a T, but we have problems with a pdoc, the pdoc wont see us for a nother month due to centerstones rules, and we wait for t to help us to get some sort of human help to get out of here and safe so we can eat and sleep. and not worry. why am is it no one else is sleepy but when me comes out me cant keep eyes open no mores.

~Mary
~so sleepy forgot me name.

[YellowWallpaper]

I don't know if you're coming back to this forum anytime soon, but if you do, HI Mary!

Our system has a Mary too. She is ALSO very, very freezing cold! We're not sure why, either. Look for some blankets! I'm going to leave some blankets with her teddy if she's out and about and cold.

As far as wanting to stay out, try to remember about sharing. You need a break too, a rest, a time to warm up. Perhaps someone in your system can give you a cuddle or play toys with you while you wait for your turn? They most likely want to support you and take care of you. Sometimes it's really frustrating, and everyone feels frustrated (mad or angry) sometimes.

hope that helps!
~Y

[Lexi232]

Thanks. I dont know who intially wrote this topic. but i think I have an idea.
It's odd to even hear from her. I think it's super cool we have the same name
I wish i could share my warm and fuzzy hoodie with her and you! . Thanks again!

~Mary