Just thoughts

since june I havent been myself. my therapist left in june and since then been feeling disconnected most days and dissociation comes so easily. I dont care to fix it. Its been six months and I have no fill in therapist and sometimes I get to the point that I dont want one cause I am done with therapy all togehter. to include medications and IOP. Most of the time i am in complete conflict with myself about everything and honestly dont want to deal with it. I hate my situation hate myself hate is the only feeling i tend to have. besides images of self harm. I often wonder if therapy is worth it, I know that it will bring up urges to self harm and drink and such but i dont want to engage in that atleast I dont think so. not sure why I am writing this anyways I dont want to have a therapist that I start to like they will just leave me too. i dont want to burn them out or make them tell me I havent changed.

If you have no desire to see a therapist.... then don't. It's a free country. If you choose to talk to some-one then you can do that too.

If you did want to talk to a therapist, and if they are a good therapist I doubt very much that you would be a cause of burn out for them.

Hate is the worst feeling, it means you are not enjoying your life any more.so you must see your therapist.........

Hate is a byproduct of hurt. I think talking to your therapist is a good idea. Remember you don't have to talk about things that you don't want to talk about. Eventually you will be willing to talk about those thing. But start off slow. It is good to have someone to talk to that makes not judgement. Feel better.

Here listening ((((just2b))))))))))))) Crew

Wow...I just read my own post and realized that I am still in the same boat. I am still without a therapist and really think at times that I need something, for just yesterday i cut to require stitiches. I was in a dissociative state. How can this be getting better?

I don't know why you don't have a therapist. There are always mental health groups that offer low or no cost therapy. And if you have health insurance that should pay for a therapist. Or are you saying you just havent gone out to find a therapist? Talking with my therapist allows me to hear what is in my head, or to see changes in my presentation and behavior. Talking to my therapist is helping me to get to know my system.

Just wanted to say thanks for listening! I have gotten some better sleep and some of the dissociation has gone away. Lack of sleep can be dangerous!

I am glad to hear you are feeling better.

i havent gone away still here and kicking!! lol