[MomgaJupiter]

I'm new here, but I've been reading posts for a long time. You have all taught me so much already - I'm really greatful. I'm probably DDNOS, but haven't done the testing. Almost totally co-conscious, but have trouble making my parts do what I need to do. It makes me feel like a bum, but I'm really not. I don't have a therapist except every six weeks or so - I'm pretty much on my own with this. so i thought id try posting some stuff. Pretty scarey to do right now...

[Gretchen]

It can be hard going it alone but you are very brave to post and reach out to as much support as you get. I've found forums to be very helpful in dealing or learning just about anything. I joined a hamster forum when my twins got them and learned so much more from talking to actual people with hamsters than all the informational sites provided. Keep posting.... it helps

take gentle care

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by MomgaJupiter

I'm new here, but I've been reading posts for a long time. You have all taught me so much already - I'm really greatful. I'm probably DDNOS, but haven't done the testing. Almost totally co-conscious, but have trouble making my parts do what I need to do. It makes me feel like a bum, but I'm really not. I don't have a therapist except every six weeks or so - I'm pretty much on my own with this. so i thought id try posting some stuff. Pretty scarey to do right now...

I hate to tell you this but not being able to control what your alters do is what DID is. in the DSM IV TR the very first diagnostic criteria is all about having alters that have their own thoughts and ways to do things that are out of the person who has DID's control.

your alters are just doing what ever job, purpose and reason for their being there is all about.

my suggestion... dont worry so much about trying to...make...them do what ....you...want them to do. maybe go at it from a different angle of finding out what their jobs, purposes and reasons for being is all about. that will tell ...you... how to best work with them instead of against them, by working with them instead of against them things will get easier because you and the alters will be communicating and co operating with each other with in the limits/confines of each others abilities..

one way to think about this is you wouldnt go to your job and force your co worker to do things your way and only your way. you would find out what the job entails and then together you and your co worker would come up with the best way to approach the problem based on what you and your co workers abilities are.

working with alters is the same concept. they cant do what is not with in their capabilities and you also cant do things you dont know how to do or cant do. every one has their limitations of what they can and cant do ...even alters.

[beadlady29]

beads wuold liek to remidn u that u not a bum just becuz u parts not do what u want them to do........they r individuals & until ye all lern how ta commcaet an get alogn will act as any indvual....gonna do wat they wants/can do.........but this absolutely not maek u bad....okay?!
all of us beadies

[MomgaJupiter]

Thanks! Beads.

Sometimes I really feel bummish - like a bad mama that I won't get up and do the dishes for three days and they stink. My little people just don't wanna and I don't know how to get a bigger part to come forward and take charge and get things done. But then my little people shouldn't have to act big if they aren't. it's confusing.

[Claritytoo]

Originally Posted by MomgaJupiter

Thanks! Beads.

Sometimes I really feel bummish - like a bad mama that I won't get up and do the dishes for three days and they stink. My little people just don't wanna and I don't know how to get a bigger part to come forward and take charge and get things done. But then my little people shouldn't have to act big if they aren't. it's confusing.

Maybe you are depressed. When I find it difficult to get out of the house I am usually feeling depressed. I take medication for my anxiety and that has helped.