the mothr would hurt with words
she would say words back
the mother would be mad
the mother would wait
she would appologize because of fear of punishment---usually threats to be sent away.
the mother would smile and know she won again.
the mother always won.
she went back to hiding because she will never win.
the mother went on hurting again and again and again

((( constellation )))

I'm sorry. You are safe right now in this moment.

Hugs for you.

[Fuzzybear]

I'm sorry hon ((((((((((((( The Constellation ))))))))))))

[Evangelista]

Words can hurt and trigger, I am sorry ((White_Iris))) you had to endure this with your M*...hurtful words directed at a child can break some things that time does not heal easily..at times it may feel like ever..children endure so much... the ramifications of childhood Abuse can be replayed as we grow in linear form... but the words..my gosh the words..can throw us back into that state of being vulnerable, and hurt, and in pain and can trigger us into a dissociative state where we are living the hurt again and again and reacting to it...so be gentle with yourself...

Know you are cared for...all of you(s)...



Eva

[Mahali]

I understand. So very sorry this is happening.

[bipolar_bear]

I am so sorry that you went through all this. Please take care.

[January]

(((((((((( Constellation ))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry.

Hugs,

Jan

[wanttoheal]

((((((((((white_iris)))))))))))
I'm so sorry she did those things.

[hillbunnyb]

))))))))))) white iris (((((((((((((( mean people suck. still and always. You didn't deserve it. I'm sorry you had to go through such crappola growing up. Glad you can unload some of it here for us to share.

[WePow]

(((( Safe hugs!!!!! )))

((((((everyone))))))
this is a rough journey. so much easier to stay hidden. so much easier to cope the way i did before. don't want to disappoint anyone so i put on my "everready bunny hat" and keep on--bang bang bang
once it was "who cares what i do, no one even notices me"
now it's "ppl care and they will hurt if i do something to hurt me" dont' want ppl to hurt. but it hurts.
n

[hillbunnyb]

ahhhhh, the fear of disappointing others....... baby cakes, that will certainly "check" your "thang"..... motivation to take care of yourself is a good thing, eh? hang in there and breath with the knowlege that people care and you are not alone and we support your healing.

sometimes i wish i didn't care. sometimes i wish that no one cared. sometimes i wish i could stay in my hole. it's not as easy as it was before.
uncovering those caring feelings hurt.
b'cuz then everything hurts.
naomi

[hillbunnyb]

yeh, there is the bit of time when everything hurts, but it will shift again and less will hurt or will hurt less..... keep breathing and moving through.... one baby step at a time will do the trick. be gentle with yourself ok.