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#1
Oct 16, 2014, 11:49 PM
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I reach out to you and you don't respond or call. As a person who has the same disorder as me it would help if I could talk to you and vent, not *****, just vent. Cus no one else knows what I'm talking about when I say that I was unresponsive to my mothers tears as she worried that I was gonna harm myself and that my father, the stoic bastard actually showed emotions towards me for one of the first times in my life and I didn't even care.. It's hard not caring when I do care but not mentally and physically not being able to show that I care. Like it paralyzes me to show emotions not out of will but because that's what psychosis/depersonalization whatever you wanna call it does. I don't want a pity party I just want someone to listen to me who gets it. Thanks for not being there for me, but I get it everyone's sick of hearing my ****
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#2
Oct 17, 2014, 12:21 AM
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Do you think it may be fear that paralyzes you so you can't show the emotion?
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#3
Oct 17, 2014, 12:23 AM
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I thought it was fear for a while but it's not that's just a coverup so that I don't have to deal with actually feeling anything. I actually just can't do it. Like my body/mind doesn't allow me to I just don't think anyone gets it
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#4
Oct 17, 2014, 12:30 AM
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Well I'm sorry that whoever you were talking about decided not to listen to you tonight. There's bound to be more people here overnight. Are you in the states?
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#5
Oct 17, 2014, 12:31 AM
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Yeah I live in the midwest
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#6
Oct 17, 2014, 09:26 AM
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Quote:
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#7
Oct 17, 2014, 12:13 PM
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I'm okay I woke up earlier than usual to work on a group project and was able to hold a conversation with my group mates when we were done. I feel a little bit more in touch with my feelings today I'm working on being able to stay in touch with them at every second of the day
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 Angelique67
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#8
Oct 17, 2014, 12:31 PM
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That sounds slightly better! I hope the day unfolds well for you.
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#9
Oct 17, 2014, 12:32 PM
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Thanks I appreciate it
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#10
Oct 18, 2014, 08:58 AM
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Having contact with the outside world can help us at times to feel "more normal". I encourage you to keep going.
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#11
Oct 18, 2014, 09:02 PM
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No amount of time with people makes me more comfortable with them. I just can't relate and don't know what to say. I've always been like this it's a part of my social anxiety. I'm too laid pack and too comfortable with silence I could go mute and be fine with it aside from the fact that no one would be my friend
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