Has anyone done this? I did when I was younger, but I only suspected then, not too much know like we have today.

Lucky me I guess, very accepting of this condition, but others in this system are straight up freaked out still in disbelief and denial about it.

I do admit though, before the "know", bliss was blessed regardless of what we thought then.

We focused on the outside then, never daring looking inwards. Now it's backwards, we are forced on the inwards more than the outside.

Now we can see who, when, what, how and why. The central image, the system facade that we consciously cultivated and created since birth has been obliterated. We can't hide the truth from ourselves anymore, even though that's what we desire...or can we?

To dismiss all this as a hoax on ourselves as a foothold back to denial to exist in a pretend reality? It doesn't seem so at this point.

If one was to achieve such a feat, they wouldn't be posting in this forum and there by reading this thread. It's just here to express our desire and wish to return to Neverland.

[Shaly78]

A day to day example, using myself get up television weather current events etc, check social media/email, eat breakfast, shower, clothed, get in my car, drive honk at the traffic light, turn on the radio, get to singing, get my purse, keys go in the store get what I need pay for it.....Now say in this particular, example not saying it will never be the thought, but there is too much going on outside world for this to be the focus. You know what I mean? Just a thought.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Has anyone done this? I did when I was younger, but I only suspected then, not too much know like we have today.

Lucky me I guess, very accepting of this condition, but others in this system are straight up freaked out still in disbelief and denial about it.

I do admit though, before the "know", bliss was blessed regardless of what we thought then.

We focused on the outside then, never daring looking inwards. Now it's backwards, we are forced on the inwards more than the outside.

Now we can see who, when, what, how and why. The central image, the system facade that we consciously cultivated and created since birth has been obliterated. We can't hide the truth from ourselves anymore, even though that's what we desire...or can we?

To dismiss all this as a hoax on ourselves as a foothold back to denial to exist in a pretend reality? It doesn't seem so at this point.

If one was to achieve such a feat, they wouldn't be posting in this forum and there by reading this thread. It's just here to express our desire and wish to return to Neverland.

no there is no way to ....forget... you are DID after getting the diagnosis...a person can deny it, ignore it but forget it after being diagnosed no. that doesnt mean the problems have to run your life or define who you are, by that I mean you ....have....the disorder, you are not the disorder, just like someone can have a hallucination but they are still a person not hallucination. a person with dissociative disorders can if they choose to just continue on with life like they did before being diagnosed,

example after I got diagnosed nothing changed but my perception (how I perceived my diagnosis, my life, my system and body) getting the diagnosis did not change what has been happening for all my life. even though I had the diagnosis I could still if I choose to not follow my treatment providers, not take care of my problems, continue spacing out and feeling numb, having no control over my life and what was happening in my life outside my body. or I could choose to follow my treatment providers and feel better about my life and everything that comes with being diagnosed, internally everything continued on like normal ...well my normal... where each of the alters had their own jobs, purpose and reasons why they were there and they continued to do their jobs purposes, reasons for being because thats what dissociative type alters do.

I could choose to think and say i dont have DID but saying and thinking that would in my mind be saying rainy didnt exist, rainy wasnt real, thelma doesnt exist thelma isnt real, but my treatment provider explained to me do that and what happens if they are not needed anymore then they will integrate and I will clinically no longer be DID....or...life will go on just like it has for all my life where the alters continue to do their jobs, purposes, reasons for being, just like they did before I was diagnosed. only this time I would know why my boss was giving me a lecture for missing a meeting (because thelma had a date) or why i woke up holding a teddy bear and blanket after a storm (rainy hates storms)

then my treatment provider reminded me...if life was so perfect before getting diagnosed then why beyond the college semester did I stay in treatment, the semester was over I passed the class.

my suggestion is keep following your treatment providers and things will feel better for you soon, if you dont have another treatment provider at the moment try some of the tools you have already learned to help yourself feel better.

[finding_my_way]

only when things are quiet/not active or in my face and affecting my functioning, emotions, thoughts, etc. up until a few years ago, there were times i would be given info/know about the others but then it would be taken from me again...probably more as a child too though. it sometimes still happens, so i actually try to keep reminding myself of things...especially incidents that happen where i've felt/heard one of them during a dissociative episode because i feel if i forget it, it might take away information i need to know in order to help myself/them somehow. i don't know. still a lot of guesswork with things.

at one point, i thought i knew so much about them (but not when they developed or why)...and then years later it's like i don't know how it is anymore. while they stayed consistent so i knew kind of who was who when they come around again, other things have changed to make it more confusing...specifically where it seems some do not know who they are if they get too close to me/blend with me..where years ago i used to know them by name.

I think it's mind over matter, but my head feels different.

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Has anyone done this? I did when I was younger, but I only suspected then, not too much know like we have today.

Lucky me I guess, very accepting of this condition, but others in this system are straight up freaked out still in disbelief and denial about it.

I do admit though, before the "know", bliss was blessed regardless of what we thought then.

We focused on the outside then, never daring looking inwards. Now it's backwards, we are forced on the inwards more than the outside.

Now we can see who, when, what, how and why. The central image, the system facade that we consciously cultivated and created since birth has been obliterated. We can't hide the truth from ourselves anymore, even though that's what we desire...or can we?

To dismiss all this as a hoax on ourselves as a foothold back to denial to exist in a pretend reality? It doesn't seem so at this point.

If one was to achieve such a feat, they wouldn't be posting in this forum and there by reading this thread. It's just here to express our desire and wish to return to Neverland.

we've not done this

the way we see it is that if you're having a good time of it, stable and feeling safe, you don't forget..... but you often wonder, if you ever had an illness to begin with, then something happens to bring you bacck to earth, and you're like, yep, still have it, this isn't a dream

same with anything. not just DID

just our thoughts which i hope make sense

Right on y'all, I think I'm gonna just take over and do my thing because it doesn't matter to me none to much. I've always said it was a frame of mind your in. Control your trigger, don't let it control you. We can do that, always have always did.

We've kept our emotions under control for so many years that we walk around like robots, swallowing hard and such, nary dropping a tear. We got shiit to do that ain't getten done. All these others always worried about how they feeling all the time, enough to drive a grown person crazy.

Not more else to say, but c ya.

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Right on y'all, I think I'm gonna just take over and do my thing because it doesn't matter to me none to much. I've always said it was a frame of mind your in. Control your trigger, don't let it control you. We can do that, always have always did.

We've kept our emotions under control for so many years that we walk around like robots, swallowing hard and such, nary dropping a tear. We got shiit to do that ain't getten done. All these others always worried about how they feeling all the time, enough to drive a grown person crazy.

Not more else to say, but c ya.

that's good advice

yeah... will bear that one in mind

There's no going back....I know that. I was so hoping even though I know better. We made it such a big deal that it's well common knowledge in our head, most everyone now believes.

The best that I can say for our system is to do our jobs and work together. We've just spent a year in self-discovery and came full circle. We know what we need, what to do, how to be, and what it takes to keep going. We are no longer a mystery, so it's time to get back to living and doing that which we need to be doing. This can actually be fun.

We are looking for another job working for others to take the pressure of working off so that we can focus on college classes to get a certification in another field. We have faith that we can pull life off like we've always have....hopefully better....we shall see.

you know when i was writing the post yesterday, i was going to use your quote and forgot it?

that's how bad my memory is

and i'd just read it. litirally