today im very ... triggery? I see that word used allot. I can very emotional, but not displayed, inside, my mind isnt very still. Its full. I wrote a hard email to my T about some stuff.

I'm left to think about how to escape .. my usuals
1. Food - only when its not this bad
2. Acting out - my typical
3. Triggering myself via movies - i know i'll float inside then
4. Spacign out at work - im doing that now
5. S.I. .. my usual if I can hide it well

What am i supposed to do to make it go away. I can't just go confront it.. i need to go inside, but it seems to be so discouraged.

[gostryter]

wish i could help...wish i could escape too...only i don't know what i'm trying to escape from...

that's good you emailed your T...hope it helps

i just started with my T this past week...i like him...but i'm almost wishing i had never started any of this...seems the further down the road i travel the more lost i feel...

(& thanks for posting a comment to my little internal/external problem! i guess it'll be ok)

[MissCharlotte]

((Esther))

Gee, your list sounds a lot like mine. When I asked T what do I do to get rid of it, he said, "just notice it."

So, I think the message from him is that we don't get rid of it, we just accept it without judging ourselves.

Of course, that doesn't help in the moment when we are ready to cut or feel like we are going out of our minds.....

So, I continue to eat too much sometimes, think about cutting but haven't in a while (urges), try to take a long walk which is a healthy solution but I haven't been able to the last 2 weeks myself.

Are there any activities that are not destructive that you like to do?

How about a movie that doesn't trigger? Like a comedy? Or getting out with someone? Just a thought. I'm kinda down myself today and spending time on PC when I should be doing homework!!!

See you soon.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Sister

me too.. past. im about to give n and float to the back. i'll try again another time.