Fighting the switches

For me, it doesn't work. I've tried to be dominant...but life dictates no way.

If you are under the delusion of control....wake up! No way

I think control can be developed.
In the beginning of therapy we had no control, but with a lot of T work, and by developing communication and co-consciousness we developed some control with some alters.
In the last few years I thought I had a good handle on control, but recent events have shown me I don't. Even with our front co-operative group switching can still happen.

I imagine it would be a lot harder to develop co-consciousness and cooperation when there are uncompromising conflicts involved (gender expression springs to mind here. )

Hmmmmm, edited to add: Control has always been an impossibility for any of our hosty persons who have tried to assert their dominance over the whole group by being the 'one and only'. Nuh-uh - that ain't gonna happen! too many other viewpoints for that kind of dictatorship! They have always been overthrown pretty quickly!!

I had a thought yesterday as I was feeling shifting inside (sometimes they are quick, sometimes they are gradual). The thought was that it's not so bad to shift/switch...it's just what we do. Obviously there are times when you need to be a certain way, like no good to be a child at work, but it was the first time I didn't feel so angry about that shifting and accepted it...and then it wasn't so bad.

Now...that was just a moment in a series of daily moments, right? But I think that could help in the long run if we didn't always fight the switches.

My t is big on understanding why a part needs to come forward and understanding what is there. Having compassion (lol, I'm so glad he has tons of compassion cuz usually I don't)!

Only reason we fight switching is because we don't want to go away. We are selfish to our time out. I mean, who wants to go to the back?

We each are able to succeed in the present until a trigger happens or a need arises.

We used to co-op till we stronger ones discovered our voice. We always laugh at the cocky ones who declare that they are supreme ruler. They may last a day, then bam....sent to the back! Lol

Hmm, can relate to that selfishness about having time out, too. Time with T was always a contentious issue.
So, if it isn't working the way it is, is there another way? Kinda tongue in cheek here, but not entirely. What about a peace treaty? An alliance of sorts... "you can have this time if I can have this time", or "you can do this if you promise not to do this" kinda thing. Though I get the sense that there are too many who are not in agreement about how things should be for this to be an easy fix.
But compromise and harmonious, functioning co-existence has to start somewhere, right?

I don't know, there are too many hurt feelings in here. Even in our system we were abused, held captive, and suppressed. Now that we've learned that we are free to be ourselves and are just as strong as the bullies, we are taking a stand.

We are alloted our times and moments, but they are lacking in empathy. So to be free, I have to be me.