by complete strangers, " so why do you dissociate?"

I knew it would happen eventually, it happened to me yesterday

I ended up saying just, well, when you've been through all I have...

I mean how do you answer such a question?

anyone else?

No one ask because how would they know? They just give me weird looks when the Others pop out at work. It is embarrassing at times.

But...:if some was to ask...I'd say that I had a tbi when I was dropped as a baby which caused mind fragmentation. Like they would know wtf I talk about. Lol

[Fuzzybear]

People tend to give me weird looks and not talk to me

I think I might also say I was dropped as a baby (near enough right )

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

by complete strangers, " so why do you dissociate?"

I knew it would happen eventually, it happened to me yesterday

I ended up saying just, well, when you've been through all I have...

I mean how do you answer such a question?

anyone else?

no never. for a couple reasons...

dissociation is a normal reaction to a positive and negative triggers in my location so every human being does it. in those I know it would probably be like asking some one why do you go to sleep when you are tired. its just something that everyone in my location does so no one thinks its abnormal.

also people here in my location dont ask about dissociation because they dont know they are encountering it. I never had the ever exaggerated / over dramatized for movie ratings type of dissociating. it was feelings inside me not something like physically climbing walls and physically climbing book cases, and physically standing on a rooftop balancing on the rooftop ledge that you see in the movies.

for me dissociation is feelings of numbness, feelings of spaciness, feelings of disconnected from my body parts or everything around me. switching into my alters was just normal all anyone outside my body saw was that I was capable of doing many things and good at it, this is because my DID was based on dissociation and triggers. I remember this one time I was at the zoo with a friend. they dared me to hold a snake. I did it and they were non the wiser. just thought I wasnt afraid of snakes and held it. mentally this was a triggering event which caused an alter that loved snakes to take control. all anyone outside me saw was me holding the snake just like millions of other normal people can do.

the only way anyone asks me any questions about any of my mental disorders is if I first tell them I have that mental disorder. I do not walk up to strangers and start talking about my having depression or bipolar disorder or dissociation disorders. my discussions on my mental disorders are reserved to very close friends, family and my treatment providers.

I think of it this way... I would not walk out on the street to the first person I see and say hey I like this sexual position how about you. so why would I walk up to a stranger and say hey I have a past diagnosis of DID and now all my alters are integrated and now my dissociation disorders are this that and the other thing.

it just doesnt make sense to me to tell just anyone about my personal information like health issues. just like the police here in my location say if you walk up to a stranger and give them your personal information you are inviting dangerous situations to occur. to take care of your self and protect online and off any personal information that can result in all kinds of crimes and problems.

a stranger on the street or where ever knowing I have a dissociation disorder could set me and my family up for all kinds of problems. like handing over the key to my front door to a stranger so they can walk into my home at any point and harm my family and I.

no telling strangers about my medical and mental health history in my location just is not done by me, my family or anyone else that I know here. even the schools are teaching children not to disclose personal information.

not to mention here in the USA we have privacy laws. no one can ask about anothers medical or mental history but the patient can choose to disclose if they want to and to who.

my suggestion is if you dont want strangers asking you questions about your physical or mental health maybe you can talk with your treatment providers who can help you to set better boundaries that will help you to protect your personal information and reserve it for only your treatment providers and those you know and fully trust instead of strangers.

[Luce]

I have never been asked anything like that. I would have thought that if a person knew enough about dissociation to know it for what it was when they saw it then they would have an understanding of what it is and not need to ask why. What a bizarre question to be asked!

I agree with Luce.Most people don't even know what dissociation is or even means,so I can't even imagine complete strangers asking.

I could understand someone asking," hey,why were/are you acting so strange?" or something similar,but to ask why you dissociate...that IS a bizarre question.

Did they actually use the word 'dissociate' ?

[Luce]

Although, after getting more information from inside ... my DID friend once told me that on her counselling course she noticed another adult student had child alter states. When they were alone one time (and after they had been friendly towards each other) my friend - in a child alter state - asked her outright "Do you have DID?" The person was initially shocked to be asked such a thing but admitted she does. Now they are good friends.
So perhaps someone who also dissociates would recognize it in another person and lack the social grace to ask it outright like that. (Like my child-alter friend!)

And I have to admit once we were in the supermarket and saw a woman who looked like she was in a child alter state as she hooned around the supermarket with the trolley and her grandson. Our own inner supermarket-trolley-hooner kid was kinda excited to see another adult-child alter and tried to keep up with them - wished she could talk to them. I wouldn't put it past our inner supermarket-trolley-hooner kid to have talked to the adult-child-lady if she had caught up with her (or him!)

So, perhaps the other person recognized in you something that happens for her (or him).

Originally Posted by Luce

Although, after getting more information from inside ... my DID friend once told me that on her counselling course she noticed another adult student had child alter states. When they were alone one time (and after they had been friendly towards each other) my friend - in a child alter state - asked her outright "Do you have DID?" The person was initially shocked to be asked such a thing but admitted she does. Now they are good friends.
So perhaps someone who also dissociates would recognize it in another person and lack the social grace to ask it outright like that. (Like my child-alter friend!)

And I have to admit once we were in the supermarket and saw a woman who looked like she was in a child alter state as she hooned around the supermarket with the trolley and her grandson. Our own inner supermarket-trolley-hooner kid was kinda excited to see another adult-child alter and tried to keep up with them - wished she could talk to them. I wouldn't put it past our inner supermarket-trolley-hooner kid to have talked to the adult-child-lady if she had caught up with her (or him!)

So, perhaps the other person recognized in you something that happens for her (or him).

Nice. Most of the peeps that are around me are construction workers and .....construction workers. Its easier to poke fun then to care.

[Michael W. Harris]

There is no why! There would only be a why if you completely control the switching or dissociation. It is a mental illness.

Would someone ask a schizophrenic, "Why are you schizophrenic?"?

In my case of dissociation, people do not see a difference in my personalities so no one would ask why. This makes me getting a diagnosis extremely hard and, to date, I have gotten no help.

I have been trying to educate people about myself by telling them with me dissociation is more about amnesia/memory problems than extreme differences in the personalities.

[Lost_in_the_woods]

Yes I don't believe complete strangers besides psych trained EMTS or ER staff has ever asked us about our "dissociation" before.. But from my experiences dealing with random (non psych/ health related )strangers who notice something "off". I very had a few different types,of experiences.
1. The stranger who insists they know me. May or may not call me by another name. If they just are certain they know me from somewhere (no name)...then just act like IDK, just must have one of those faces or familiar strangers, maybe we have crossed paths on transit schedules etc... If they call by name, then either that part will come forward and talk to them if they want to...or I just say I'm sorry you must be mistaken me for someone else. If they press I'll show them our license...
2. Acting oddly in public place. Someone asks if we're alright or OK or need to call someone..this happens sometimes if scared child parts get triggered suddenly or if talking out loud or if gone "catatonic repeating flashback state" or if "come to disoriented by unfamiliar surroundings/people.

If we're talking out loud. We just try to laugh it off as absentmindedness...and sometimes it is just that.

If we've made a scene. We either just walk away quickly find a place to "hide" until we can calm down.

Scared child usually either another part such as myself will snap to asap when spoken to by a stranger. I'm a protector and strangers=danger. My response is generally a huffy I'm fine and walk off like nothing happened. Otherwise, if for whatever reason child part does not vacate. We carry soothing objects. Drawing pads crayons small toys. Scared child parts will generally try to hide/self soothe until help arrives either in form of a "big part" or call from a known trusted person. ie Hubbie, BFF, even family member possibly..tho that's not usually ideal.

Catatonic states..are well catatonic no one is gonna respond til they pass. Gotten sent to the hospital for that a couple of times.
Disoriented in Strange surroundings..ask someone where we are. Try to appear lost..well we are lost so not hard. If people question more or we still are confused..either ask where nearest cabstand or train is....or in extreme circumstances just act drunk (not proud, but I've had to do it before)

Disoriented surrounded by strange people. Usually make an excuse and get the heck outta there! Like excuse me I need to make a call or go to the restroom etc...figure the rest out after.

Oddly enough, people we know are most likely to brush off our "weirdness"..lost some friends to this disorder unfortunately. ..but mostly they just see a sudden "mood or attitude flip" and depending they either ignore it or just walk away/hang up. Even family makes up their own reasoning for our "off behavior" ...unfortunately a lot of them think we are addicts or junkies..been accused many times and it hurts...because I almost never even drink, especially since realizing the added and unpredictable effects substances have on us. I try to keep a very clear head.

But I be said it before and I'll say it again! This disorder is a blessing in the fact that most people can not even fathom it's existence...which leads to them finding a more personally understandable rationalization for whatever comes out of us. This in its self is another layer of protection we are afforded.

[SvanThor]

I've never been asked that.

[Luce]

We haven't been asked "Why do you dissociate?" before but we have been called out a couple of times.
Once we went to see our doctor but he wasn't there and we saw a locum, someone we'd never seen before. This was in the thick of our post long term therapy DID denial days, and the DID diagnosis has never been on our medical record. In the middle of the consultation the doctor freezes in his chair, then spins around to look directly at us and said "Okay, so tell me what happened just then, because the person I am talking to now is NOT the same person that walked through that door a few minutes ago."
And we just blanket-blanked out all the blankety-blank and didn't think about any blankety-blank at all.
There's nothing to see here, sir, no, no, no. There's no DID at all.

[kecanoe]

I have a service dog and get asked all the time why I have him. It depends on my mood (or which part) but I usually say that I dissociate and tell people that it is a normal thing to do (like forgetting what you went to your bedroom for) but that I can do it for longer. Once in a while when I say I dissociate, I can tell that the person I am speaking to knows what that is. Sometimes I get asked why. My answer to that varies from I don't know to we think early trauma to telling people it started after I was very ill. It really isn't any of their business, though. Sometimes I think I should be less forthcoming because other people might not want to say why they have a service dog.

I care less what strangers think of me than what the people that I interact with regularly think of me. There is one young woman that I mentor that knows when I dissociate. Which is kind of weird because she is not particularly good at reading social signals.

[elevatedsoul]

ive been asked what it is, but i talk about things sometimes so i think i mentioned it