doesn't feel like me but

has to be me. Why do I get a thought that I think is soooo right and then to act on it, the feeling is gone? Nowhere to be found! I think a whole different thing. But I knew I felt that thought and I know I believed in that thought just minutes ago, but now NO!!
Like I told me daughter last night, I mean what I say when I say it, but then I say something different and again I mean what I say. No faking but I look like I am. I feel and believe at the moment the feeling I feel but the next time you ask me, I might have a diff veiw. Grrrr
How is THIS possible?
Cause I know I did this so why can't I get "ME" to feel it again....??

I'm sorry I don't understand your question.

Hi Shadow,
There are times when I have been influenced by other parts. T has seen it when I've talked to her and not known it and then I am there present and not knowing why something is going on or I make a decision, etc. It can be hard. Not sure if that is what is going on for you but hopefully things will settle soon. Awareness is hard, but it's a step toward recovery.

Yes, that is it! You said it much better!
I'm there and poof I'm gone but then how do I know I'm o.k.?
Feeling behind is better in only that I can feel and see what is going on, but scary because I can't talk or responed when I'm like that.
Trying to deal with not being able to hear what people say cause when I feel really really behind, what people say doesn't stick. I feel it go in but then It's gone even when I try hard to hold on to it.
thanks wanttoheal

Hang in there

Shadow,

it seems perfectly logical to me that some of our parts develop in ways that give them different views, values and different opinions on things.

to the single-view people it makes us look flakey or maybe "unstable". however, the way we had to live caused us to develop different parts of our personality that just hold views that may be opposites to each other.

it may be darned inconvenient but it is not bad of us...it just is what is.

i believe that in time as your internal awareness grows you will be able to come together with other parts or find a united place to stand where you can develop harmonious beliefs for yourselves.

hang in there and don't beat yourself up over this, ok?

leslie and the pixies