[Lauren_Ruth]

Please can somebody help me to bring myself out of a persona. I have driven my partner mad for the last week and 50% of my life is spent this way. I just dont know how to come out of these personas and my partner seems to think its my fault. Please please please can someone offer some advice that I can use????

[Kiya]

Well, for my system, Kiya is the oldest and body age. So, with important people who need to know (like T or in group T) I tell them that if they need "an adult" in the system, or I've switched into someone that isn't helpful, to ask for Kiya. And to get Kiya back, they actually have to talk about things Kiya knows about (jokes/ humor is good too). Hope that might help some.... Find out who in your system is the one that holds things together or is the older one - who ever it is you want to have the main system in control... and give your H that info and how to access that one.
Kiya

[multipixie9]

kiya's advice is good. i would suggest that you explain to husband that the kinder and nicer he can be while doing this the better it will work. if he sounds rough or angry it will frighten and alts may hide even more. they need to feel safe to switch when requested. that's all i know, i'm not up on doing this since i mostly work on triggers except with my T.

hugs, leslie and pixies

[Jewels]

It sounds like whoever is out needs something and needs your husband to give it to them. Perhaps it is something a father figure would give a child that the alter out didn't receive. If that doesn't help, then getting a bigger (in age) alter to come out, or one who is an adult, if you as host can't come out, needs to come out and deal with things. That doesn't negate the fact that the alter's needs need to be addressed. Talking it over with your therapist, and finding ways to talk about it with your husband and suggesting he try to talk to the alter and find out what they need may decrease the alter's need to be out and causing conflict with your husband. I hope you find some rest this season. It could be the season is causing this alter to be out and in need. Just a few thoughts to think about. Crys

[beadlady29-old]

((((((((((((((((((((lauren ruth)))))))))))))))))))))))
please lissen to jewels, leslie and the pixies, and kiya.

their words oare full of wisdom.

bead does not really have any other answers, but does want you to know that we
hears and we lissens and cares much.

hope you find a way out of your distress soon

bead