Thanks

Thanks to everyone who sat with me. I'm doing better now. The flurry of
emotions has settled down.

The support I have recieved here from friends has helped so much.
The affirmations that I did the right thing.
That the relationship with my "friend" is not healthy.
The guilt trips keep coming and I am doing ok.
We have some guilt feelings about feeling ok about feeling ok,
but we are working thru all this.

Friends are wonderful
You guys are wonderful
wi

white_iris,

There is a more positive side to Multiplicity. There are people who believe it is quite normal. It’s not understanding it that causes the illnesses and the depression, not the Multiplicity itself. More and more people believe that relaxing and accepting that we are Multiplicity would help us enormously. I have to admit to leaning in that direction.

It hurts me to read about your struggle.

Things will get better.

With more information comes more understanding.

Take care of you.

SAFRON,

THANKS FOR WHAT YOU POSTED. I HAVE JUST BARELY BEGUN TO READ THINGS THAT SAY WE MULTIPLES ARE A VARIANT OF NORMAL, NOT "BROKEN" OR "DAMAGED GOODS" AS SOME HAVE SAID IN PAST. I LIKE THE HOPE IN WHAT YOU WROTE AND HOPE THAT I CAN FIND ALL THE GOOD THINGS ABOUT BEING MULTIPLE. MY BIGGEST STRUGGLE IN BEING MULTIPLE IS A SPOUSE WHO ACTIVELY REJECTS/RESISTS THE VERY THINGS THAT ARE MY LIFE. WITH HELP I AM GOING TO LEARN HOW TO BE ME AND BE WELL AND HIS BELIEFS CAN BE HIS BUT I AM GOING TO LEARN HOW TO NOT LET HIS DISBELIEF TRIP ME AND MY PIXIES UP AND CAUSE US TO FALL. WE'VE COME TOO FAR TO LET ANYONE ELSE'S BELIEFS SABOTAGE US. WE SURVIVED SOME THINGS WE WOULDN'T WANT TO PRINT HERE AND WE ARE GETTING BETTER ALL THE TIME. NOW IS THE TIME FOR US TO CONCENTRATE ON WHAT IS GOOD IN OUR LIFE AND LEARN HOW TO DEAL, HEAL AND MOVE PAST THE PAST - BUT NOT BECAUSE SOMEONE WHO WAS NOT THERE DEMANDS WE DO IT - BUT BECAUSE IT IS TIME AND WE ARE READY TO DO IT. FOR US AND WITH GOD'S HELP.

FEELING MILITANT AT THE MOMENT AND GOT PRETTY EMPHATIC, HOPE WE DID NOT RANT.

PIXIES OVERCOMING!

((((safon))))
(((((pixies)))))

our friend we struggle with is also multi---go figure...

there is hope in this. we have begun to realize the great potential we have as a team, a system. what great gifts each brings into the whole. it has taken 4 yrs of alot of intense work, hospitalizations, frustrations, and pain but at the point i am at now i believe it is well worth everything we all put into this journey so far.

talents and gifts that have so long been buried and forgotten--till now. having a T and an H who have encouraged and sometimes pushed gently to make us reach father than we even knew we could--and are still finding that our reach can be even greater once we get over the fear that is holding us back. it is work. it is a struggle. it is hope.

when we first started this journey we saw others in the place we are now and said we could never get there. now we are there and still hopeful and sometimes still scared out of our mind---

it's not the END of the journey that brings the hope and joy
it is the journey itself and the discoveries made and the love learned.
the constellation

multipixie9,

I was married for twenty years and brought up three children.

I managed to hide my Multiplicity from him for ten years! Then we spent five years trying to get some proper help.

Up until then I had been treated for severe depression which, considering my abusive childhood and my dad's suicide when I was 19, everyone including my husband accepted the depression as a result of that.

I never told anyone for a long time about my Multiplicity, not until my children were older. I was afraid that I was going mad and I would lose my children.

There! The whole truth is out on this board at last!

We struggled on for another five years and then he asked for a divorce. I let him go because I was coming to an understanding of the whole thing. The realisation of what I had put him through almost killed me.

He took care of me until I could take care of myself. I haven't had another relationship, don't want one, it would be too much hard work.

We are still very good friends, he is the only man I trust apart from my children and my grandchildren. He still comes around to do the Santa bit for the kids and the grandkids, and I still get Birthday and Christmas gifts from him.

He doesn‘t understand even now but I know he cares about me. I love him, he gave me everything he had, his love, his protection and his energy.

You rant all you want, I still do on occasion.

Stay strong and stay above the battles.

Accept your pixies, they are real. talk to them, let them know that you have their best interests at heart, and that no one will ever hurt you or them again.

white_iris,

Just as you saw other people in the place where you are now, I see people on here in the place where I was. It was hard and it was very frightening but it is all beginning to make so much more sense now.

I offer some suggestions that I hope help some of you to deal with the scary stuff but I'm still a work in progress myself. We have 'others' who don't yet share our understanding but we are bringing them along gently, teaching them that it is okay to be who they are.

I am happy to pass on anything I learn. And if it's something someone can use then my struggle was worth it.

White Iris,

I want to say something encouraging about you being brave to share yourself/ves with us. That was a courageous step to take and ask for help.

The post, here, has turned into a kind of group hug and reveal. I too am on this journey of inner understanding with an outer very loving family.

But, it has been a joy to be here on PC and see that my alone thoughts about the journey are not my own and even to think outside the box on it regarding it possibly being 'normal'. lol There are parts that certainly know how to look normal.lol

I'm a fair way along too and when I see the newly diagnosed come along here my heart goes out to them. I just want to sweep them up in my arms and hold them till they stabilize and can write.

Well, here's to the rest of the journey.

(I'd put a cute emoticon here but
I don't have any right now, I've requested
to have help getting they back but not yet)