numb and...........

i know what you mean. But we're not just the children we once were we're more. We did survive then and we continue to survive. i'm just as terrified and, at the same time puzzled at myself. Given what i know to have happened, how can i still be afraid of what's to come? Why do i continue to go through doubt, proving to myself, reproving to myself what i know to be true while again, wondering if i'm just overly imaginative or impressionable. The things that happened to me no one wants to believe, including myself i suppose.

Anyway, i don't have the answer to how we will get through it. i do understand, i think, that we need to know in order to be whole. i respect my parts even as i dread some of their attributes. Learning to embrace every aspect of myself is very very hard. That respect makes it hard for me to envision "integration" yet i also believe that doesn't mean they disappear...they just cooperate seamlessly. i feel like i'm rambling here.

Hang in there bead, beads, beady, beadlady, mary of beads and everyone else i have yet to meet and i'll hang in there too.

{{{{{{{{{{{{MeSo}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

definitely not rambling MeSo..........we so interested in hearing anything you would like to say........
dunno why but beads is tearing up.AGAIN after reading what you worte which seems so strange cuz we dont even know what efeeling is or is supposed to be attatched to these tears we seem to be shareing with you today........a lot of empathy maybe...........and so much appreciation for YOU and all that YOU are!
beads comes and sits down beside her freind and we will have a good cry tog.
then .......we can approach the rest of this day with renewal and hope.

hugs,
marsidotz
p.s. you help all the beads so much!

Tears too, not sure why either. Friends.

(((((((((((((((((((MeSo))))))))))))))))))))

come, lets sit awhile at the ocean's edge in the sand and the sunshine;

then we'll continue on our paths towards healing and a brighter future........

you is good freind, mean much to all the beads!!!!!!!!!

hugs,

mary

((((((((((((((((((((((((beadss)))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I'll sit with you on the sand with the sun shining down upon us. It will bring healing. We can each sit quietly or share our pain. There is a brighter future. Sometimes it is just a hard journey to get there. But you will. May the sun shine on you today.

(((((((((((((((((((BB)))))))))))))))))))

thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!! how absolutely sweet and touching!!!!!
we will all sets down in the sand tog.....
shareing our pain,
and/or
setting quietly,
enjoying each other's company,
the sunshine, so warm, the sand ,
the wind in our hair.........

anyone else wanna sets with us?

hugs,
mary susan

gggggggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

methinks were being sucked up .....well, down..........

by the sand.........sorry....no one fualt here, just stuff its too much!



into the darkness

understand, agree

((((((((((((((((MeSo))))))))))))))))))

we will NEVER give up.............no no no
cannot will not let ourself..............

must keep walking towards the light

beads

her friend

NEVER give up--don't let the bastards win!

MeSo we could not of put it no gooder then that!!!!!!
thank you!
hugs,
bead

Hold my hand and I will help you not get sucked into the sand. The sun on your face and the gentle wind are so much better. Maybe we can all look up together.

BB

((((((((((BB))))))))))

Thanks you so much!!!!!!!
beads is now holding your hand, and we are desperately trying to keep her head outta the sand so that seh CAN look up towards the light.......
we know there's some light on the other side of this darkness, somewhere, just gottsa find it.....
searching,
beads