[MandaMay]

He says he wants to work on things, try being friends and starting over, but he just seems to be going at it all wrong, I have given him two years to figure it out, he has agreed and let me go on a few dates, with and as Friends only. He tells people I am his wife-ish and we are only together because of the kids and money (last part I agree with) I am not looking to get married again or divorced, again, I thought things were working out well, then he flipped and now they are not so good, every little thing has to be a fight. and he is starting to pull me down with him. I just wish I knew what he wanted so I knew when it is ok to be happy.

[Leed]

Its unfortunate that you have the kids to consider, because I'd tell you to just leave -- but since you have the children it's not that easy.

Why did he "flip out?" Why is he so upset? You say every little thing has to be a fight. Is he always so critical?

Is counseling available to you? Could you two go to couples counseling? It might be beneficial if you did. It almost sounds like he just hasn't grown up yet. I don't know how old you two are, but he sounds a bit immature. Is that true?

If you can, try some counseling. It certainly can't hurt! I hope he'll go. Let us know, ok? I wish you the very best. Take care. Hugs, Lee

[Mike_J]

It's OK to be happy now, or at any time. With that said being happy isn't just like turning on a switch.

And I would be less worried about knowing what HE wants and trying to figure out what YOU want, and the best way to get it.

[K-seperated]

When its OK to be happy? You're in a bad relationship - one of those traps where its not quite bad enough to leave, but you hate what the two of you have become as a couple (am I right?). I think you should start to make whatever moves necessary to get out of that relationship.