[DivineB]

its been about one since me and my other halve separated and i wake up everyday alone i look at the other side of the bed and want to cry i'm trying my hardest to fill up my time but everything i do feels nothing i'm so numb from day like before we separated i wasn't receiving treatment for my problems so i guess it harder on her than i realized i'm in love with her with everything i have i never been in love or better yet realized how much you love person till they are gone...i want to get her back in my life i need her in my it feels like or i need some way to get this feeling to go away i feel like i pushed her this far....but i still love her

[Leed]

Can you tell us what happened? Do you suffer from depression, or what?? What's going on? I'm sorry if you posted it before -- I haven't seen it.

It does sound like you need treatment. Can you see a therapist? Call your doctor and have him refer you to a good therapist. You won't regret it and it will make a huge difference.

Perhaps if your girlfriend sees that you're getting help, it might make a difference. Maybe there will be hope of getting her back -- and maybe not. But even if she doesn't come back, you'll at least have gotten treatment and will be healthier for it. You DO need to see a therapist, regardless.

So call your doctor or see him -- and get the referral. It's the best gift you can give yourself. God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee

[DivineB]

it was stupid why we separated we both actually agree on tht it was a dumb little *** argument that blow out of proportion....from that moment we were both angry......but at the same time i regret everything i said to her and apologized to me but i feel like i needed to better myself before i'm on meds but no therapy

[agatha9]

I think it takes time to get over a separation. A month may seem an eternity when you are suffering, but it also feels like a minute when you are really enjoying being with someone. Maybe it will take a little longer and you are forcing yourself to be fine as quick as you can. And also, maybe you just have to understand that, even though you love each other, things got out of control and you needed some time and space to set your emotions clear. I would suggest that you try your best to be fine, to be positive and not to feel like everything is lost now that she's gone. If you both really want to be together, you'll find a way to do so. But the first step is that you rearrange yourself and get over all the issues you have that may have affected your relationship. Otherwise, you'll end up fighting and breaking up again. You should try to figure our what went wrong and talk about it to try and fix it as a couple, as partners.

Calm down, remember the good times and what makes you be happy together and then talk with her about it. But don't do it with tears in your eyes, don't do it desperately; talk from love and honesty and you'll see you can do wonders.

I do wish you two get back together and be happy again

[DivineB]

i needed that.....thank you

[agatha9]

If you need any more thoughts or different points of view of what you are going through, feel free to post it here or write to me. I've found out that strangers sometimes have a better point of view, because they see everything from the outside.

I myself have been through a relationship where we used to break up every now and then just because things went out of proportion everytime we fought. We didn't live together but it was painful. We both had too many problems and unsolved family and personal issues. I got to work on my problems and he tried as hard as he could. After four years we finally separated definitely, but we're still the best of friends. We can communicate much better, we still love each other, but wr have to remain just friends because he doesn't live here anymore. So, I would strongly recommend you go to therapy and take your meds. I don't know your case, but sometimes a good therapy can work wonders where medication has failed over and over again. I, for example, used to cut and hit myself, I wanted to punish myself and even wanted to die. But there was a point where I understood that I wouldn't die and that the best punishment I deserved was to face what I did and not to hit myself. I also realized that there's a big difference between being depressed and being sad. There's no point in being depressed, cause life goes on and it never stops for anyone, so I keep on doing what I have to do, sometimes I force myself to go to parties because I know I can't be sad forever, life won't wait for me. Right now I'm starting to get over one of the hardest times of my life. It was very painful, but I always knew it would pass. It's been 8 months and sometimes it still hurts. So... I'm sorry for such a long post. I don't even know if any of this helps, but I'm sure empahy always makes us feel a bit better