[jimmy rich]

My marriage works now because we learned how to make it work after our 1st ones FAILED! We just didn't know any better then so it all went into the dump!

IMO, what makes a relationship work is knowing or learning how to make it work and both partners have to do it.

I googled: Relationship Tips (try it!) and found: Top 10 Tips For Building Loving Relationships | World of Psychology

The tips in that article are powerful and link to many other resources where partners can LEARN HOW to make the relationship work and NOT fail.

Our original training came from Barbara DeAngelis Barbara De Angelis PH.D. - Official Barbara DeAngelis Website who taught us about 100% honesty and truth which sets the stage for a TRUSTING and respectful relationship but it also takes learning about healthy behaviors such as: Frequent expressions of love and affection, NO CRITICISM, ridicule or meanness of any kind, genuine expressions of empathy and acts of common courtesy, and a commitment to real friendship – not just when we want something or we are in a good mood.

We learned and use all kinds of good relationship skills such as: frequent and LONG kisses, softly touching each other without needing to talk a lot, smiles, acts of caring for no reason and any of the other things we did at the beginning when we were “hot for” each other so that our love and passion does not die the slow death that is taken for granted in most marriages.

I’d like to read in here about how any of you are keeping your marriage/relationship alive and well and about any references you’d like to offer here or anywhere else to help struggling people salvage their own relationships.

Thank you,
jim & irene

[kaliope]

nice topic..thanks for sharing those links

[jimmy rich]

To anyone interested in this subject and willing to work on their relationship skills, I offer this link: 10 Rules for Friendly Fighting for Couples | Psych Central
IMO, any relationship will benefit from the simple and powerful items in places like the one above.
I deeply regret that I did not know any of this stuff when I was younger and struggling in difficult relationships.
good luck

[Terabithia]

a sense of humor goes a long way

[eskielover]

When you marry someone who has financial issues, attitude issues& passive aggressive behavior, an inability for closeness...yet can be a nice person but very argumentative....there is no way of making the marriage work...as he claimed it was his personality & problem areas couldn't be changed....7 years away from him while trying to take care of the IRS mess he made with my inheritance that he didn't have the decency to tell me about nor the foreclosues on the house my name was still on....I finally figure out the cause of bis problems. A dx was impossible until a few years ago....all the things I said in our together therapy, they never grasped what his dx should have been that fits him 100%.

Too many battles too much anger..feeling i had no way out but by death...could never go back tk a life like that now that I'm learning what normal is even if there is a valid reason for his behavior there is no more toleration left in me after all those years

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