[sunflower001]

Hi all, I am going right now thru a painfull time. My husband and I we were in Europe last month. We had great times. He went back to move from Nevada to Florida and my daughter and I suppose to come end of the month. He started new job there.
On this day we were discussing health insurance over the phone, he promised out daughter a horse( she is 11) and at night we had a small argument over a ebay issue. then 5 h later boom: Voice message via whats app that he want separation and will not buy out tickets back to USA. So we are here, left with 2 suitcases at my parents apartment. i am crushing on their couch..I am out of the German system here. All out stuff is in Florida. He does not react, changed his phone number, moved even out of the apartment we got .. We had problems because this was the 5 move but we are christians. I assumed everything will settle down once we moved and we got back to normality. We were separated the last 3 months, I was packing, he worked overseas.
I am shocked. Don't know what to do. I need to go back to US within 6 months or I lose my green card. We are married 5 years and together 7. I need clothes and stuff. My daughter is stressed out because of the school here.
His email are very angry and mad. He said he does not give me a chance now, in4-6 months???? how I suppose to live with that? I don't have apartment here and it takes sometimes 1 year to find something. Our life in in USA. My husband does not talk to my daughter either. She is hurt, cries... It has been 5 days and he moved again, started his job . he said he is free, He felt like in cage the last 3!!! years...He never talked about that. Separation is one thing and I do understand him, but to leave me here with my daughter and refuses to buy tickets ..thats what I do not understand. Banks ect he changed everywhere passwords ... what I suppose to do now? I was stay at home mom the last 10 years.

please advise. Is this a normal behavior?

p.s. he wrote prior this this emails and said he wants separation but then he said sorry that he was only drunk and felt better now.

[glok]

Welcome to the Community, meggi76. Have you talked to the US consulate about your circumstances?

I wish you well.

[sunflower001]

Originally Posted by glok

Welcome to the Community, meggi76. Have you talked to the US consulate about your circumstances?

I wish you well.

Thanks. No I have not done anything yet. waiting if he wakes up...I don' t know..

[healingme4me]

No, this is not normal behavior. He just stranded you overseas. Along with a consolate, can you online search and find an attorney in the state you last resided, to consult about your legal rights to assets and filing a divorce?

[sunflower001]

thanks. I will contact a attorney . I was hoping he just want to be alone for a bit but he also cut me off from skype today, email. No idea what is going on and why. Runaway husband with wife abandonment syndrome ? his reaction feels a bit scary. He was the kindest, honest person I met :-( i thought... Why acting like a psycho now...

[SnakeCharmer]

The above posters have given you good information. It would be good to visit the American consulate or embassy to talk to them about what rights you have and what rights your daughter has. If your daughter was born in the USA, she is an American citizen.

If your husband sponsored you to get a green card as part of your marriage, he probably had to sign a Form I-864. This is an affidavit of support, in which he guarantees the government he will support you at a level of at least 125% of the poverty level.

I don't know what your rights are, but it is very important that you find out. There have been cases where a spouse has been stranded overseas and has been able to sue in US federal court and win support. The consulate is a good place to start. Be sure to take passports and I.D. for both you and your daughter.

Your husband's behavior is not normal. If he suddenly decided he wanted to end the marriage, he may be stranding you and your daughter because he does not want to be required by the government to support you and your daughter while you get back into the job market or go back to school to learn how to support yourself.

Please find out what your rights are, if any, and then use them to protect you and your daughter. I wish you the best of luck. As sorrowful as this situation is, I am very glad you at least can stay with your parents. I hope this works out for you.

If the consulate cannot help you, it is essential that you find out immediately what you have to do in order to stay in Germany legally and to get yourself back into the German system of social services and medicine.

[jimmy rich]

Hello sunflower: Sorry about what is happening to you and your child.
If I were you, I'd call the Police ASAP and ask them for advice on what to do since they would most likely direct you to the US Consulate and other agencies and resources that could help you secure yours and your child's RIGHTS in that grim situation. I would also find a marriage counselor to help me figure out what went wrong in my marriage so things like this might not happen again in the future with that or any other partner. I would want to know whatever I need to know in order to PROTECT my child from being damaged by such a hurtful parent.
Good luck,
jim

[Mike_J]

Is your daughter a US citizen? Is your husband the father? If the answer is yes, contact the child welfare department of California (you list your location as San Fransisco so I am assuming you were living in CA before your trip to Europe). Abandoning a child overseas would likely be considered a criminal offense. And regardless of anything else if he is the father he has a legal obligation to support his child.

[Ansley Wyman]

I think the behavior is really disturbing and alarming. If he can leave you just like that, I wonder what is the worst he could do. Yes, he is your husband but you as his wife should also be treated with respect and dignity. Good luck!