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#1
Feb 07, 2010, 04:47 AM
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i have been overweight since i was on anti-depression when i was younger, after i was taken off them the weight just never went away so i have always had the 'i'm fat' type of mind set. well 3 years ago i started to get sick, malabsorption and low B12 which cause alot of weight loss...and now things are just out of control!
i have not admitted this to anyone real life (online feels safer) but i am scared of being over weight again, when i was diagnosed with bipolar i said i would never take any medication that caused weight gain, i would rather be dead then over weight again! now after i eat i just think about the weight gain from it and feel terrible about eating so much. i am curently eating very limited food, closer to starvation really which is the 2nd time i did this in the last few months and i am happy about what i am doing. happy...i am happy i am starving myself? i should be able to stop myself but i can't. it was suggested by someone on another board i could be on my way to a ED/already have one..but i don't know, maybe i need to hear a few more people before i even bring it up with my doctor. i am worried, still have malabsorption issues, already on a restricted gluten-free diet due to GI issues after i eat it, really do not need anything more. is the fact i am aware of my behaviors mean i am just making it all up somehow... |
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#2
Feb 07, 2010, 01:55 PM
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absolutely not, you should definitely try and go for some T, sounds like you have alot of stuff going on and you could benefit from some professional help. anytime you are starving yourself is not good. I will pray that you can get through this time.
__________________
Amanda 
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#3
Feb 09, 2010, 11:37 PM
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bigger question is, how does one bring up the topic?
usually when i am doing/thinking something i know is wrong i will tell someone so i do not do anything, this time it's different. i am finding ways around people finding out, thinking how i will handle my upcoming birthday dinners well in advance eating as little as possible  that and...will not eating effect my BP meds? i know lithium works based off of salt in your body. |
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