[Aardwolf]

I havent eaten properly in nearly a month, I know why, I know I can't do anything about it. but I still wan't to sort it out..
When i say not eating properly, its not regualr, its more than enough ( I think) but most people would probably tell me i'm not having enough

I hate the thought of someone else knowing better, and wanting me to change, but.. I'm starting to really feel it now. I don't have any energy, I have headaches. i get so exhausted just from walking up some stairs..
But i can't stop..

[ickydog2006]

I'm sorry that you are struggling. The side effects of not eating are one of the things that help keep me on track, especially since I have a child. I can't afford to go without food and end up passing out (I have in the past), or driving when I'm so tired from lack of energy. Chances are if you are experiencing the symptoms you've described, you arn't really eating enough. Have you tried keeping a food journal? Most of the time I feel like I have eaten more than I really have.

[Aardwolf]

I know I'm not eating enough, but i refuse to change. I can't change, its who i am, its what makes me, me, and most importantly its how i cope. It gives me the control I needed so much, but now i don't need but i'm stuck in a vicious cycle.

[precious things]

Can you pinpoint the feelings that are driving your ed behaviours right now?

[Inedible]

How would you feel about controlling your diet by choosing more nutritionally dense foods to include, so that you don't need as much of them? Dairy foods are good. Nuts and vegetables are good. Eggs are very good. Most people could benefit from a daily multivitamin.

It is one thing to change because someone else tells you to do it; it is another thing entirely to change because you have seen a reason to do it and you are the one steering a new course.

[avoice]

can't or won't? think about it

[Aardwolf]

I suppose I could try, I just feel ill even contemplating eating, let alone actually trying to..

But yes I understand what your saying, it drives me mad D: Deep down i'm not sure what i want..

[Inedible]

These are really tasty and you can get them at GNC ...



You can sip on it and keep it in the fridge. One of them gives you all the protein you need for the day and half the calories. They are really tasty, too.

And doesn't drinking your calories sound better than eating them?

[Aardwolf]

GNC ? I live in the uk, I don't know if they make them there..
Looks good though, would help me not realise what i'm doing..
Had a bowl of cereal this morning ! felt awful during but feel quite a bit better already. I can't stand the thought of having more to eat today though :/
I suppose if i can consistantly have breakfast then work up from that ?

[Inedible]

There is probably something similar you can find near you. Really, it is better if you can find something and choose it for yourself than to drink this just because someone on the internet suggested it. Liquid came to mind because it is so easy to just sip them all day without realizing how much they add up to. People do it all the time with soda, but I am sure you can find something more nutritious.

I'm glad to hear that you are feeling better and that you are considering having breakfast again. It sounds like a very good start.

[Aardwolf]

Yes I will definatly have a look around, do a bit of "googling" and all..
I was dreading this morning, and eating made me feel ill for most of the day, but at least i got something inside of me. I'm not looking forward to tomorrow though.
My self esteem took a hammering today due to certian things that have been said and I'm really starting to re-consider the whole thing.. In terms of going back to how i was, but i know i have to change, but i don't want to D: *arghhh*

[Woundedheart1]

Acqpl. I know exactly how u feel. I don't like food nor do I want to eat at best I try and force a half to a whole boost in a day if I'm being mindful. This is an incideous cycle. Hit me up if you need to chat.

[Aardwolf]

Yess... I've managed to somehow force myslelf to keep having at least breakfast.. even though it still makes me feel ill, its not quite as bad as it was at first..