[njgirlatheart78]

I tried dieting the "right" way. Joined the club went to the weekly weigh ins and was losing weight....then it hit me....this was so much quicker when I would just pop 20 laxatives or just throw up after meals....maybe then I can be the skinny, hot, sexy women that men want....so that is what I started doing. With that comes the usual, blood in the vomit, bloody noses, doubled over in stomach pain....but BOOM I lost weight. AMAZING.....I want to keep going....

Then "Grace" and I made a pact, it was we couldn't do anything to harm ourselves without talking to each other first, which for me included doing this....you mean I have to eat the food and let it digest and just watch myself grow.....NOOOOOO

I have been staying strong b/c of "Grace" but let me just tell you, I just think how easy it could be to just let it all go.

Maybe now you can see why I call her my "Grace" b/c she is my Saving Grace.

However, what do I do about the urges and passing up all the stuff that I do just b/c I don't want to taste it to enjoy it and then just binge......

[lil_bit]

Have you talked to "grace" about your thoughts? Perhaps she is experiencing the same feelings and you guys can further help each other through this.

Just keep in mind that the "easy" way isn't so easy in the end, and it's almost never the best way. The fact that you made a pact with another to help both of you leads me to believe that you are a strong and caring individual...stronger than the whims of your mind and tummy.

(((njgirl)))