[luckyyouxx]

I just did it again, puked up some noodles and cookies about 2 seconds ago. I've been trying to recover, I can usually go a week without puking and then i slip again but i've been puking more in the past 2 days lately. I told my bf about this a long time ago and hes been supportive but i guess the way i look and act and feel has been scaring him so he told his mom about me being bulimic. shes a great woman and very smart, and i hope she will help me but i am so scared to talk about this to someone who can actually do something about my condition. as in, they might want me to get proffessional help. but im just so scared to get it. half the time i feel like i dont even have a problem, but lets face it i've been at this for exactly a year now. i've clogged my bathroom sink, im white all the time, depressed a lot, i dont like going places sometimes just because i hate how pudgy i feel, my throats the shits, and my sex drive is decreasing. i need help i just can't seem to reach out and grab it. i still wanna keep losing weight so bad. someone help!! i dont know what to do...

[Christina86]

((((((((luckyyouxx))))))))))))

I'm glad your boyfriend and his mom are trying to be supportive. Getting professional help is scary, but it's usually a good idea to get some sort of help like that if you want to stop.

Take care of yourself.

[luckyyouxx]

thank you

[luckyyouxx]

oh, how do i get proffessional help if i don't think i can afford it? i hear you have to be really financially committed. im just so scared that im never going to be able to stop.

[Christina86]

(((((((((luckyyouxx)))))))))))))

Just noticed you were from Canada. Me too!

Well, if you're not able to financially pay for the priciest types of therapy, you can find places that will either do pro bono (for free) or for reduced fees. It just takes some calling around. I'd suggest your best idea would be to talk to your doctor, or phone/see someone at a local hospital and tell them you're looking for low-income counselling. They should be able to help... also, depending on your insurance plan and the type of therapy/therapist you can also run it through an insurance plan or maybe the government helps 'pay' for it?

[luckyyouxx]

woo canada! haha. im from the beautiful british columbia... gotta love it here!

turns out that if i go to a doctor first, they will refer me to help and it will be covered by medical. so lucky for me it wont cost a thing. im going in to do this on thursday with my boyfriend and his mom. I'm really nervous about it though, i dont know what to expect from it. i havent even talked face to face to my bfs mom about it, larry has been talking to her through me. im just so nervous that it will be hard to talk about this... im going to be scared shitless come thursday! eek.

[Christina86]

I'll think positive thoughts for ya then!

Maybe write things out? That makes things easier for me ... I have a tendency to forget things when I feel stressed out. Answer as much as you can ... maybe your BF can come with you if you want him to and its allowed? Good luck!

[jujubean22]

i think the fact you have support from your boyfriend and his mom is great. therapy would be good for you. i think the fact its starting to affect your personal life is getting to a point where you need some help. Good luck and im sure you'll be fine

[luckyyouxx]

thanks you guys
your positive feedback definately has helped!