[Genevieve]

I'm having problems right now, and my treatment is not addressing them directly at this point. (Largely because I just finally mentioned this to my therapist, and have a new pdoc who's still working on medicating other issues right now.) Even though I know that there's a problem, and even though I know what the problem is, and even though I know that it really *should* be as easy as eating a bit more each day, I still find myself following the same patterns. I'll promise myself that I'll have a snack today, but then I don't. I even buy wonderful things for the snack, to tempt myself, but I still don't. And I find that, even though I swear that I really do want to put some weight on, I still eat less than I know I need, and put off lunch until late afternoon, so that I won't be tempted to eat much at dinner.

Why is this so difficult? Has anyone found anything that helps? What sorts of treatments have people found helpful?

The worst of it, of course, is that -- even though all that I said above is true -- I still don't *really* want to gain weight. I *know* from experience that I feel better and am healthier about 45 pounds heavier than I am now, but that just doesn't get through to whatever part of me needs to understand it.

Thanks for reading this.