Feeling hopeless

I really need to vent. I hate bulimia! I'm sick of being sick, sick of cleaning the toilet several times a day, sick of saying "today you'll lose weight. today you'll do better" and failing each time. I try and try to overcome this thinking pattern and distract myself but somehow the bulimia manages to talk over all my other thoughts. I don't know what to do anymore. I've tried speaking with counselors, support groups, medications. Nothing seems to work and I feel like my own worst enemy. Sometimes I think maybe I should just accept that this is the way life will be from now on... that I shouldn't hope to get better and then maybe I won't be so disappointed in myself and the way I spend my time day after day...

maryc, I am sorry you are struggling so much right now. I don't have time to write--I am heading out the door for therapy. Please know that I ready your post and that I care....and understand the frustration.

it is hard.... and... i share simliar feelings.... know that i care...

((((((((((((( maryc )))))))))))))

((((((((((maryc))))))))))))))