[camel]

Hi everyone.
Do you ever find yourself just mad for no real reason??
Well that's me today. This morning I woke up and my five year old and me made pancakes together. She made me one all by herself so I ate it and felt ok about it. Then I weighed myself (which I do all day long) and I've been nauseated and grumpy as hell since. I don't know what's wrong with me. It just seems like nothing goes the way I want or plan it to. I find myself wanting to be at work all the time because there I'm in control and even if there is chaos (I'm an EMT) I'm in control of it. I know I'm not articulating very well, I'm just very frustrated and feeling disgusting. It's getting harder and harder, I feel like I'm losing my grip. I want to just stop eating and I don't know exactly how that will help other than making the #s on the scale get lower, but I feel like if I don't eat I'll have a handle on the rest of my life.

[darkrunner]

Hi camel,
I think I know what you mean.....I had that kind of day yesterday - I tried to eat 'normally' and it totally ruined my day. I was extremely depressed and anxious and I couldn't stop thinking about food.....I felt so out of control!!
This morning I woke up, worked out for 2 hours, did yard work and then took my kids hiking....I've hardly eaten anything and I feel so much better.
I understand when you say it is getting harder and harder...I feel the same.... like it can't go on this way....but how to change it??
Sorry....I guess I'm not much help. But maybe it will help a little to know you're not alone.

hang in there,
ktgirl

ps - loved your subject - is there room under the rock for 2?

[marcelodlanod]

... No... you are not alone!!!... and ...that makes me feel even worse.. is sad that we are dealing with such a stupid thing!! Please, dont take it personal.. i dont mean to ofense.. but.. do this thought cross your mind: there is plenty of people in the world that dont have nothing to eat.. and im feeling like a crap for having something.. .. .. are we that selfish?!?! ..yes, is not our fault.. in fact.. we would give our temptations to them... but..we cant... isnt that stupid, ironic... ?!?! .. Its our messed up minds... the ones that f##K us... is society... is ourselves.. and how to scape from that?? .......well... am i angry or what?.... Again... sorry.... but, i think that.. we deserve something that... really hit us in the face... and make us react... awake! ... Dont you think?

[camel]

yes, i agree