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#1
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Lately i've realized how far I go to hide my eating disorder, or what ill do to please it. Example: My boyfriend was in the bathroom so i ran outsid with a plastic bag, did my thing, and then burried it in the garbage. I take out the garbage so i wasnt worried he'd notice ........ or if i eat fast food ive purged as im driving down the road back into the bag and then throw it in the weeds on a back street. Its sad i know ....... but i just wonder if im the only one llike this.
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#2
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((((((((Nevagiveup))))))))
Just wanted you to know I read your post... ....I don't purge and it doesn't take much effort to hide my disordered eating (since I'm a stay-at-home mom and I'm not with anyone but my kids all day).....but I feel for you and I hope you are reaching out for help IRL. From what I've read, purging on a regular basis can be really harmful...I'm sure you know about that too. take care of yourself, ktgirl ![]() ![]() ![]() |
#3
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How far... you are so cute!! i've done worse things... my dog was sick.. it couldnt eat nothing but its pedigree food... but.... my ED was first... so, i gave it my food in every lunch.. it ate it, of course because that dog food taste horrible, and... after weeks of suffering... it died... i killed it, and now... i missed it in the wrong way... i need someone to eat what i dont eat... im a beast..........!!! and i dont deserve to live... do you agree? .... Dont puke, its bad... and harder to hide to docs, once they examine you, your throat wont lie for you.....
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#4
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If my parents were around I would take a small trashcan into my bedroom or into the unfinished basement to purge and then hide the vomit in my closet until the coast was clear to dump it in the toilet.
Sometimes I had my younger sister, 6 years younger, sit outside the bathroom door on guard-watch as I purged. I had her warn me if my parents came near enough to hear. -I don't judge any of you for the drive-by purges or deaths of canines. How could I when I blame myself for teaching my brothers and sisters disordered eating habits? |
#5
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i have always found that sick just stinks! like its so strong everyone knows when i do it, like it just smells out everywhere. i have has laaringitas becuas emy through is just ruined really. plus now i am watched eating, and then for half a hour after my meal so i dont be sick- fustrating huh?
please hang in there and try not to purge- its really horrible and soon like if you carry on, you will just naturally do it- but i know that doenst make you feel any better God bless xxxx |
#6
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I feel so scared because I don't know how far I'd go. It has a STRONG HOLD ON ME
I have an 8 year old daughter, what am I to say to her if in the future she struggles like me?. |
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