Weight Loss and Exercise #4

My weight has been redistributing like crazy lately due to my meds being at a too high of a level and I look kinda sick at my current weight of 158. I just took some pictures yesterday. My face is also guant like due to the meds and my eyes look like somebodys eyes do when they have Chrons disease. Its just a medical issue but nothing to be alarmed over I don't think. My doctor should tell me tommorow what to do. If I have to explain to him I'm starting to look like Pete Davidson I will. I'm pretty sure he knows who he is and what he looks like so he'll know what I mean. I just haven't been hungry for one thing but I'm still getting my calories in they just haven't been the best quality but at least I'm eating. I'm working with my therapist as well on this. My shorts have started getting really big so I'm wearing jeans in 90 degree heat but at least they still fit.

I had mostly soda today if I'm being honest. And a Reeses and a hunk of London broil and 2 scrambled eggs. I didn't have the energy to really eat. I did stay under my carbs and my sodium goal though and my protein wasn't terrible with the all meat and the 2 eggs. I am at 1,223 calories. My mom claims my weight loss is intentional and I mean can't weight loss be both intentional and unintenional at the same time. Like I want to lose weight but I'm also just not very hungry and I don't excercise.

Trying to stay at around 1200 calories during my cycle because I wasn't planning on being able to do vigorous exercise due to cramps and bloating. But what do you know, this morning I felt in the mood and did 45 minutes hard on the bike trainer, and then a fast paced 3 mile walk with Andy. We did about 4.5 miles total today walking. I was hungry for a snack but didn't want to eat dinner until after my 7pm therapy appointment, so I had a can of chicken broth, which is only 15 calories.

I am stressed that I haven't seen a loss yet, when I have been so on point with my diet and vigorous exercise daily, which I haven't been able to do in the past. I know my cycle and hormones are screwing things up right now. I made a deal with my therapist to stick with it a few more weeks and just stay consistent and if nothing happens to my weight then we will re-evaluate the strategy.

I don't want to see a doctor - don't anyone even bring it up. I have too much medical related PTSD, and doctors tend to never have much empathy or compassion - at least the ones I've seen.

But I do think once my hormones settle down it will resolve. I mean, even though I feel crampy and bloated, the waistband of my shorts felt looser when I put them on yesterday. So I really think I'm just retaining water right now - I mean, did I mention I'm feeling bloated? Lol.

I ground up tofu with southwestern spices, mixed it with a little cheddar cheese and some hot salsa and spread it on romaine lettuce leaves for dinner. Sort of a healthy vegetarian take on tacos or southwestern lettuce wraps, whatever you want to call them. They were really good, actually.

I did 45 minutes on the treadmill today plus some resistance bands exercises and weights. Been eating a lot of vegetables and cut out a large amount of sugar

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I was frustrated a few weeks ago because my weight stalled even though I had made massive healthy changes to my diet and was exercising a lot. That was during pms and then my period. A few days after that all went away I weighed myself again and my weight had gone down, hopefully it's the same for you. You're doing a great job with the exercising and eating healthy by the way

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Ive loaded my pantry with canned veg, beans, rice, potatoes, and tuna. Well and cookies, and those little cans of chef boyardee. Everytime i think of ordering pizza or subs, i pat myself on the shoulder for eating beans instead (which yeah makes me toot!). Oh and low carb tortillas.

Seesaw, hang in there! You cant "lose weight" unless you do surgery - lipo, cut off a limb, whatever! Its about being consistent. I think of myself as the Queen Mary - i are trying to turn this ship around. Dont be a pontoon boat so easy to flip. I like this better than the marathon/sprint metaphor - less sweating!

Before I had my hystrectomy there was only like 11 days of the month where I could make weight loss progress because of my period. I had PMS for 2 weeks straight and my weight would just stall and then like 3 days before my period or my supposed period I'd get really hungry.

I've eaten today, kinda. I had a lunchable and a poptart for breakfast and a 100 calorie pack of almonds for lunch. I had one full calorie soda a couple minutes ago and then a couple diet cokes with cream in them early this morning. Dinner will be some london broil. I'm still really low on calories but I'm not too hungry because of my procedure. I've had a ton of water though. I read doing phlelbotomy burns like 600 calories I'm not sure if thats true or not.

I weigh 157.2 I told my mom I want to lose 17 more pounds. She said "from where?" I'd like to lose it on the sides of me. I saw my pdoc today in person for the first time in almost 2 years. He just complimented me on the weight loss and said I looked good. He didn't say I looked too skinny or anything. I ate a totally unhealthy sandwhich for lunch but nothing else for the day because I just wasn't hungry mainly. I don't know how many calories that sandwhich had but it has to be less then 1200 because what sandwhich has more then 1200 calories?

So, I still weigh above 245 lbs. I weighed in at 248.0 lbs just a moment ago. I tried some weight loss mechanisms years ago and I weighed in at 180 lbs. I would walk to a Dollar General and back to the house, and also walk to the park around it twice and back, and some yoga. I would love to start doing that again. I feel like I'm in the current state I'm like feeling in my body the illusion that I am incapable of anything and that I couldn't ever do this one thing call exercise and lose weight. My legs I mean they go wonky....It's just this true feeling I'm incapable of anything physical or physical labor. It's probably an exaggerated Schizophrenia even that I am not able to move past these things sometimes.

I was 159.4 today. My scale got off caliber when I moved it yesterday. That or its stress. My mom moved it again today so it could be off again. Yesterday I had 1053 calories. Today was 1210. 140 calories I had at midnight. 160 calories was at 3AM. So it wasn't the best but I'm not going to fight it with how I've been feeling physically and the stress I'm under. My goal is to get to 150 pounds by October. 140 by the end of the year. Anything below 140 and I will look sick.

Sorry it's been a few days since I checked in! I was at an agility trial with Andy through most of last week and weekend and too tired to recap.

I'm down almost 5lbs since I started posting again and getting through my menstrual cycle! Yay! I can feel my body changing, my range of motion is improving, my strength is improving, and making better food choices is becoming much easier.

My goals this week are to continue to stay at around 1500 calories or less.

I've grown bored with oatmeal breakfast, so I am switching to fruit for a while. I do find it easier to go through stints of having the same meals so I can easily prepare, and then when I feel I'm getting bored with those meals I switch them up. Sort of a balance between making it easy and keeping it fresh and a variety at the same time.

Let's all celebrate with a dance party!

Oh yeah, they dont really mention Tin Man Syndrome re PMS, do they? You just think, wth is WRONG with me?! Then you wake up as baby again with your big toe in your mouth, no problem!

Well i walked from my dr appts to the bus stop today and monday. Today was a longer walk than monday's, but it felt shorter. Plus i was wearing better shoes today - boots instead of teva sandals. Still i love how fast i can see even a little improvement.

My dr is starting me on insulin. He thinks i can start feeling better, i.e., more energetic. My depression pretty much seems to be in the past. I am very excited to have reached 141 cholesterol. It seems i am always striving but never achieving, and that is utterly frustrating.

I bought Arctic Cool brand men's tees and shorts (women's dont come in my size). I love them! They do keep me cool. They have a baseball type cap too, also very cooling. It may be my imagination, but i feel like my androgynous presentation is more accepted by the strangers and acquaintances these days. I dont know if it's MY own attitude that has changed, or if more people have just become educated about the agender agenda (little play on words there). Just because im not all femme, doesnt mean i want to be a boy. Leave me alone about all that! Turning 70 doesnt hurt either.

I was 158 exactly today. So far I had a full calorie dark berry Dr. Pepper, an Amys burrito, and a large Diet Coke with cream from Sonic. I'm currently at 580 calories. I'm not sure what else I'll be eating besides the other Diet Coke with cream I have. My stomach is queasy today. I also have to stop eating after midnight and I can't eat again until who knows when. So I plan on saving some of my calories for 11 tonight. If I actually remember to wake up at 11 unlike all the other times this has happened where I've forgotten to.

I think its just a bit of loose skin. But phantom limb syndrome has me freaking out right now.

What gives? This is the second time this week where I have made it to 158 excatly and then the next day shot up for no reason. Right now I'm at 159.6. 161 with clothes. I'm trying my hardest to make it 150 by October but its been tough getting and staying under 158. I feel super fat right now because I'm wearing gym shorts.

Doing really well. Down that full 5lbs and I know that the 6th lb that takes me back under 200 is just around the corner. And Andy kept me so busy today I'm exhausted!

We had our morning 1.5 miles, then we went running 2.5 miles, then he wanted to play/train after dinner, then he wanted another walk so we did 1.5 miles. We did 7 miles total today! I burned so many calories it's ridiculous. And I managed not to give into temptation to have sushi and cooked my dinner!

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Well I'm back at 158 excatly today. I'm going to skip the Diet Cokes with cream to see if that helps. I think they add in more then 100 calories worth of cream. I bought some broccoli and some fennel yesterday that I need to eat. Then I'm going to have chicken and salmon for dinner. If my stomach holds up that is and I am able to eat all that.

It looks like my new med regime is working. Dr added 20 units of insulin at bedtime. I took it for the first time last night. Today my numbers are better, though nowhere near good. And i am already feeling a little more energetic.

I notice I retain water and gain a few pounds around my cycle and then lose that after. But I am mainly at a plateau with weight, right on the cusp between overweight and obese. And my belly makes me look like I'm pregnant.

I think thats why random people smile at me on the street (or used to pre-covid). I was like, geez do they think im a grey- haired surrogate or just a REALLY old mom?