Gambling Problem

I've been dealing with compulsive gambling problems for the past 12 years of my life. it's really hard somedays. I've had periods of sobriety and periods of trying to keep relapses a secret and periods of controlled gambling... but i hate it. i wish i didn't have this lingering self hatred about all the financial wreckage i have caused in my life. that part.. i can't just let go of.

Any suggestions?

Try Gambler's Anonymous. What it did for me above all else was to introduce a group of people who got it and wouldn't let me b.s. my way past the problems gambling was causing to me and those around me. The first year was tough but I haven't played video poker since April of '07. I'd wish you good luck, but a strong belief in luck and strong desire to prove that your 's is somehow superior to what the math says it is is part of the problem. Take care of yourself.

First welcome to the forums. Ratanddragon is right about Gamblers Anonymous. It really is a big help and it is nice to know that you aren't alone.

I know that it's not easy to do but don't beat yourself up over the lost finances. We do things in our addiction that we never would have done otherwise. I'd like to share something my sponsor said at the 2nd meeting I ever went to. He said that back in the day when van gogh, picasso, rembrandt, etc were painting canvas was really expensive so if they painted something that they didn't like they didn't throw it out. They painted over it with a painting that they did like. He said that that's what we are doing in recovery. We are taking the life that we don't like and stroke by stroke changing it to a life we do like. It isn't going to be over night but things do get better. I've been in the program since 2000.

Here is something in the Towards 90 days book that I think is great.

ANOTHER CHANCE

Fellow gambler, take my hand;
I'm your friend, I understand.
I've known your guilt, your shame, remorse;
I've borne the burden of your cross.
I found a friend who offered ease;
He suffered, too, with this disease.
Although he had no magic cure,
He showed me how we could endure.
We walked together side by side;
We spoke of things we had to hide.
We told of sleepless nights and debts,
Of broken homes and lies and threats.
And so my weary gambler friend,
Please take this hand that I extend.
Take one more chance on something new,
Another gambler helping you.

I'm here for you anytime. Feel free to pm me whenever.