[Restin]

I seem to have done a pretty neat trick on myself in therapy. I have deep transference issues on T that I've hardly discussed. But we started talking about me being a good parent to the inner child some months ago. But I've latched onto that and pushed how I can be such a good parent, can do everything for the inner child. And it seems now that there's no use for transference talk and everything's come to a conclusion since I say I can be all to myself.
And I hate being my own parent and my child hates me for this maneuver. I'm not sure if T is hoodwinked with this, but I feel so speechless and scared whenever we get near transference talk.

[pegasus]

Hello Restin,

This article here talks about transference http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...e-transference

Therapists in consultation with one another may refer to transference as a general statement about the strength of the therapeutic relationship.

I don't feel the leaving part of the article is necessarily true but the reason why I have given you this link is so you can see that transference really is ok (both positive and negative transference.) It's now time for you to start talking about it with your T. Your 'parent' has control of the child part but that is not what it is all about and if not careful you could start controlling too much. So, take the bull by the horns and tell your therapist what is really going on! You are making good progress.

[Piraeus]

Hi Restin. It's nice to meet you.

Wow!! A ten year member. That's really cool. I don't think there is anything missing here. I think you have grown up. That's a good thing. Now your child needs you. I bet you are a great Mommy. How old is your child?

I admire what you have done so far. I have had bad experiences with therapist's in my past. I don't see one now, but I should. I have my pdoc. I need something else though. I don't know what.

I'm glad the transference has faded. Now you can focus on your child's needs.

[Restin]

Pegasus, I think you hit the nail on the head about CONTROL. I had not seen how much I was reverting to that until you pointed it out. It's true that I have control issues. Poor T. I will need to bring this up next week when I go to therapy. It's so self defeating to stomp on my own toe. Thanks for the article, too.

[healingme4me]

Haven't talked to an online friend/ acquaintance in years, but was she was often discussing her inner child work on herself and in therapy. It tended to be the go to purpose, in an endearing way. Not every one, who walks the walk through therapy focuses on this aspect. I remember she did, as a means to understand fears, anxieties and mind reactions. How to not personalize things said in marriage. And to find similarities in growing up, i.e., her parents role in hows and whys in here and now.

Hope that helps.