[yakmom]

I am stepmother to a 34 y/o female who has 4 sons, ages 14 to 9. Yes, 4 boys in 5 years. My main thing is there always seems to be a crisis surrounding her. She has had Treatment twice d/t a major breakdown following a buried memory of abuse. She lost her boys for 3 years and got them back May, 2014. Her mobile home burned Sept.2014. She STAYS physically sick from a variety of things. ( I think she has Munchausen's, but I've only been a Psych nurse for 20 years, what do I know?).
She is eternally broke. Intelligent, but working at a big box store when she could go back for 1 semester and have her degree.

She is to be married Friday night and today (Tuesday) has sent out a text that says " I am in need of help getting food for the wedding". What?! you ask. But, this is typical. Crisis upon crisis upon crisis. I sent her a msg that said I am doing as much as I can financially getting the cake. She does not know how many people will be there or anything common sensical. (I know that's not a word, but it applies).

She was 21 when her father and I married and it has been like this from day 1. I don't know what to do. I am sure her father will rescue the day as always, but that doesn't help in the long term. We have Tried and I mean really tried to get this young lady to stand on her own, but nothing seems to stick.
I guess I just needed to get this out. I just want to be done with all of this. The last time she posted "They say I may need to go back to the (mental) hospital" sent me into literal hysterical crying. The next day she was happy and laughing, "haven't felt this good in years". She has PTSD, is most likely bi-polar and the only med she takes with any regularity is 0.5 Klonopin when she feels like she needs to calm down. Yes, she needs to be seen by a mental health professional, but will only go to a GP/NP.

[avlady]

sounds like a hard situation to deal with. hopefully she takes her meds regulary, does anyone help her set up her pill box or does she carry it with her. she could be abusing her meds too, without realizing it. good luck

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm sorry you have to deal with this

[yakmom]

Avlady, that's just it. She isn't on meds. For awhile she was, but now she only sees a GP/NP. She has 0.5 klonopin that she takes once or twice a week. She has a twin that is basically the same. She ran a borrowed car out of oil and burned the motor up and now is in my car. They have no filters. Always have wanted rescuing. My DH says "don't worry about it so much". Well, Hades, someone has too. They'd be a worse train wreck if someone didn't anticipate their antics. They have 7 children between them. Only 1 isn't on some sort of ADHD med. Help us all, Lord.

[yakmom]

Well, she got married. The wedding was lovely and funded by many people including myself. In one week, she has gotten money from her uncle and again from me. She knows that my well is dry. She used to be a manager of her department, something she worked years to be. She took off so much for "illnesses", they demoted her and gave her job to someone else. She works about 20 hours a week now. Not my Problem anymore. I will do anything I can for her kids. But lack of planning on her part does not constitute an emergency on my part. Not any longer. I have more (many more) issues to deal with other than her. Thanks.

[eyesclosed]

Hi I noticed your husband bails her out. How do you feel about it? Does he just do it without your approval. I experienced this for 14 yrs and it made me feel like a outsider until it came too end. You can't break the biological bond they have. It's hard to keep your distance and still be a family, your outnumbered.