[MtnTime2896]

Can adults suffer from this or do they simply suffer from isolated symptoms?
Trigger Warning Below
This question is actually pretty personal to me as I have a constant fear of losing my mom. All the time, it doesn't leave. It was hard to leave home simply due to knowing I'd have to leave her. I understand my childhood with her wasn't stable. She left in my early adolescents (wasn't the first time but was the longest)

Possible trigger:

and she had attempted suicide in front of me once.

She also is very clear and open about her SI when she drinks and sometimes when she's sober. I don't think my excessive fear is normal as it's on my mind regularly throughout the day.

What do you think?

[Misssy2]

Originally Posted by Só leigheas

Can adults suffer from this or do they simply suffer from isolated symptoms?
Trigger Warning Below
This question is actually pretty personal to me as I have a constant fear of losing my mom. All the time, it doesn't leave. It was hard to leave home simply due to knowing I'd have to leave her. I understand my childhood with her wasn't stable. She left in my early adolescents (wasn't the first time but was the longest)

Possible trigger:

and she had attempted suicide in front of me once.

She also is very clear and open about her SI when she drinks and sometimes when she's sober. I don't think my excessive fear is normal as it's on my mind regularly throughout the day.

What do you think?

I do think it is normal for an adult child of an alcoholic
My son is the same way .
I'm sorry.

[MommaD]

Given your history it's not at all surprising that you have separation anxiety. Are you afraid your mom isn't coming back when she's away? I can understand that. She's left you before (your teenage years) and she's tried to leave you through suicide. How could you not be highly anxious when you're not with her? It's a normal response to abnormal circumstances

[MtnTime2896]

Thanks Misssy.

Thanks MommaD, it's not just a fear she'll leave, I'm terrified she's going to die. It scares me so much that when I find myself not fearing it, it scares back into being scared, you know?

I find your anxiety completely understandable (sounds like it is based on reality/not a delusion) and am sorry you have had to go through (and continue to go through) this traumatic experience.
I am sure my attempt was traumatic for many people in my life and still work hard every day to ensure I do not get like that again. Despite feeling sort of "boring" when I am medicated, I have been taking everything my psychiatrist prescribed to me since December 14th and the last time I had a drink (I was only having one a day during a vacation) was in August. I am willing to give up alcohol because I know it makes my lows lower (and my highs higher). Basically, I am committed to a completely mundane life as repentence for what I have done. From what you have said about your mother, she is likely in more danger of becoming suicidal so long as she continues to drink. I think excessive alcohol makes us more unstable, especially when it comes to those of us that have drank excessively most of our lives. I hope that some day that she can give it up too. Though one of my grandmother's drank excessively from the day I met her (my first memory was when I was about 6 years old) until the day she died (she was in her 70s). I know that is depressing but I think it is best to hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. I really do hope your mom continues to recover. She sounds wonderful in many ways. Take care of yourself and know that it is possible for both of you to get better. <<<hugs>>>

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm sorry about your mother.. didn't know that

It's understandable if you're worried about her.. I hope she will get better, though. Good luck

[Fuzzybear]

I can relate - I'm sorry and I think your fear of losing your mom is very understandable. I hope she gets better

[MommaD]

Yup I get it. Dying is the ultimate "leaving".
what you're feeling is really an understandable response to what you've been through.
But that doesn't make it any easier to deal with.
So sorry this fear is part of your life and your relationship with your mom.
Do you think she has a similar fear for you?

[MtnTime2896]

Originally Posted by MommaD

Do you think she has a similar fear for you?

I can't be sure but I really think she could. I think when I got cancer over two years ago, it scared her really bad. I've almost died a few times in my life but that was one time I couldn't hide it from her. She had to take care of me for a while. Tend to me after my surgeries, find something I could actually take in when I was going through radiation. Had to pick me up off the floor when I'd pass out. I don't think any of that was easy on her. Her eighteen year old was sick and told that they wouldn't survive long without treatment; that and her kid didn't want to do anything about it, initially. It was the first time that my depression was brought to her attention. She had to really help me out of that, too. My mom and I got real close when I was almost eighteen, but before that it wasn't stable and it could be explosive at times. Then a few months after we rebuilt our relationship, I get sick. She took care of me; and we got even closer.

I mean, she's my mom. I love my mom. She was the only one who tried to protect me from my dad and consoled me when he'd tear me down and make me feel like I was less than dirt. Every since we got past our crap, she's always been there to build me up. I'm actually tearing up because I'm that scared I'll lose her.