[LifeIsReal!]

It has been a while since I posted but here I am. As I reported last month, I've been suffering with a undiagnosed mental issue which stems from listening to loud music with earphones, early in the morning in the 11th grade. It seems as if the constant loud music has damaged a nerve or something in my brain which causes me to talk to myself. Sometimes, I don't notice when I do it but others do and shake their heads. I was 16 in the 11th grade and I'm almost 24 now. This has been an embarrassment to me. HOWEVER, I remember when I use to come home from school, go to my room and get on my knees and Pray to God about this issue. I did it everyday for a long while. And I noticed the relief and had more control over it. That was my God working. Now I can say today, I have definitely improved since but I thank the Lord for it. But I still have the problem and need guidance and direction on the next step. I am very self-conscious. But I'm glad that I'm on this website forum for help. What should I do next? Any advice will help! Thanks! Blessings!!!

[mote.of.soul]

Hi LifeIsReal!

Aw, I'm glad things have improved for you, it's a relief when that happens. But yes, perhaps you'd like to talk to your doctor about the symptoms you're still experiencing and also about getting a diagnosis. From there you'll be able to attack these symptoms head on and hopefully overcome them as well.

[LifeIsReal!]

Ok. I am very embarrassed and humiliated. Please know that I am far from a cure. I need to get a medical brain scanning. It's a daily battle and struggle and I pray that I don't have deal with this for the rest of my life.

Thanks again!

[mote.of.soul]

Sure, I hear you. No need to feel embarrassed please. It's like me, I've made progress in some areas - quite massive progress actually - but in other areas I still struggle and I'm effected as a result. Yet, I've still made the progress, though you wouldn't really know it to look at my 'life', hehe. Anyway, you're welcome. Yes, see your doctor and explain everything. People overcome all kinds of hurdles all the time, it'll be okay.

[*Laurie*]

HI, Have you spoken with a doctor about the problem you have? I'm asking because I'm wondering who told you that you have damage from using the ear phones.

[LifeIsReal!]

No, I haven't spoke to a doctor about. I think a neurologist would be more appropriate since I believe I need a medical brain scan. I'm very much ashamed about this. I know I'm not schizophrenic. No one told me about it. I don't talk about it to people. I'm a private person. I said that because I know that that's where my damage comes from.

The only person that I have talked to about it was my mom and God. People think you're crazy If you talk to yourself. Like I said, I don't always have control over it nor do I always notice it. Both of my parents, see me talk to myself, and say "Don't do that. People will think you're crazy." I understand that. But I wasn't born with this issue. I was listening to loud music early in the morning everyday when I was in the 11th grade. After a while, I notice that I didn't have complete control over my mind. I told my dad about it and he said "Well, you're just a teenager." And I'm grown now. I'm not sure what my diagnosis and if it's a cure for this. I would hate to live with it for the rest of my life.

P.S. I would NEVER openly discussed this issue with people especially in person. And also to people I know. When people know you, they can talk about to many people and it can effect your reputation. But complete strangers, can not do you any harm, since they don't know you and can't see you.

Any further advice would be appreciated. I'm not sure about going to a doctor right now. But I would love to talk to one online just to see what they can tell me and I can go from there.

Thanks! Blessings!!!

[TheLifeFantastic]

I talk to myself when I'm working on problems when I'm working on something. If I'm trying to figure out a problem in something in programming or other matters. I do it without really thinking about it to tell you the truth. Some people do find it strange that person will talk to themselves as they are working. But talking to oneself without it being a delusion of some kind is not a problem. This article below shows that it helps people, but it may make you look more eccentric. I don't know if this applies, but I don't think it's a real issue unless it's harming someone.

https://www.lifehack.org/334241/why-...ing-scientists

Also nice meeting you other Life!

Blessings Upon You!

[Seneca1854]

Look at this way, an illness is something that impairs your ability to function and get by. It makes it harder to work or go to school or eat, or something.

Talking to yourself isn't like that. It doesn't get in the way your basic life functions. I know it's embarrassing sometimes, but you don't need to worry.

You can do your own research but I'm pretty confident that experts say talking to yourself is fine.