[rdgrad15]

If it was possible to travel back in time and track your old self down and teach yourself about all the mistakes that are about to be made, would you do it? Would you even slap yourself? For me, I would go back to my high school years. I was very naive back then and had trouble telling the difference between someone who was truly a toxic person and someone who may have liked me just fine, but just didn't see me as a friend. Knowing what I know now, I know a lot of trouble could have been saved if I knew all of that back in the past.

I would track myself down and tell myself to use common sense. I would tell myself about the mistakes that are about to be made and may even point out some people or scenarios I should avoid all together. I would also point out the differences between a true friend, a toxic person, and an acquaintance that may like you but not see me as a friend What would you tell your past self? Is there a certain time frame, like high school or something? I know we would all like to go back in time and warn ourselves about stuff that will happen.

[Have Hope]

Oh yes..... I can relate FULLY to this right now!!!!!! Getting married for me was a vast mistake. I had doubts beforehand, but went through with it anyways. And now it's a very toxic relationship for me that I must exit. I WISH I had talked to my former self having doubts, and I wish I had listened to those doubts. I kicked myself for a LONG time over it and beat myself up for not following my gut. Lesson learned!!! The very hard way!!!!!!!

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

Oh yes..... I can relate FULLY to this right now!!!!!! Getting married for me was a vast mistake. I had doubts beforehand, but went through with it anyways. And now it's a very toxic relationship for me that I must exit. I WISH I had talked to my former self having doubts, and I wish I had listened to those doubts. I kicked myself for a LONG time over it and beat myself up for not following my gut. Lesson learned!!! The very hard way!!!!!!!

Aw I'm sorry you were in a toxic marriage. Glad you learned and got out of it. Unfortunately sometimes we all have to learn the hard way. And unfortunately those who are naive at first are way more likely to not think things through or listen to their gut. I know I was like that. A lot of crap I've been through could have been avoided had I listened to my intuition.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by rdgrad15

Aw I'm sorry you were in a toxic marriage. Glad you learned and got out of it. Unfortunately sometimes we all have to learn the hard way. And unfortunately those who are naive at first are way more likely to not think things through or listen to their gut. I know I was like that. A lot of crap I've been through could have been avoided had I listened to my intuition.

Well, I am not even close to being out of the marriage yet, unfortunately. I have a long ways to go before I can leave him. But yes, I wish I had listened to my gut, which was telling me he is trouble.

[Skeezyks]

I'd go back & tell my young self to end it while there was still time...

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

Well, I am not even close to being out of the marriage yet, unfortunately. I have a long ways to go before I can leave him. But yes, I wish I had listened to my gut, which was telling me he is trouble.

Oh okay well I hope the day when you can finally have some peace without him comes as soon as possible.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by rdgrad15

Oh okay well I hope the day when you can finally have some peace without him comes as soon as possible.

Thank you. I appreciate that.

[TishaBuv]

I was given those people and circumstances and not others. While some of my history is unfortunate or embarrassing, IDK what might have happened otherwise. So, no, I don’t want to slap myself or change anything. I’m fortunate nothing was a whole other level of something that could have happened, and I’d have a different answer. Mine are and have been just growing pains.

Rgrad, it sounds like you are referring to a person in high school who didn’t see you as a friend that is significant for you.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

Thank you. I appreciate that.

You’re welcome.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

I was given those people and circumstances and not others. While some of my history is unfortunate or embarrassing, IDK what might have happened otherwise. So, no, I don’t want to slap myself or change anything. I’m fortunate nothing was a whole other level of something that could have happened, and I’d have a different answer. Mine are and have been just growing pains.

Rgrad, it sounds like you are referring to a person in high school who didn’t see you as a friend that is significant for you.

I’m referring to anyone or anything that happened in the past. Not a particular person. And it doesn't have to be just high school. It can be before, and some even after. Basically I would tell myself to be more aware of things and not be so naive. I’m glad yoy feel like you don’t need to change anything. And I wouldn’t want to change the timeline of everything that happens in terms of where I go to school or where I go to work.. More like, I would take my knowledge and tell myself to avoid certain events or people that are not very good which was painfully obvious but I was too naive.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

I'd go back & tell my young self to end it while there was still time...

I wouldn't do that.

[TishaBuv]

Originally Posted by rdgrad15

I’m referring to anyone or anything that happened in the past. Not a particular person. And it doesn't have to be just high school. It can be before, and some even after. Basically I would tell myself to be more aware of things and not be so naive. I’m glad yoy feel like you don’t need to change anything. And I wouldn’t want to change the timeline of everything that happens in terms of where I go to school or where I go to work.. More like, I would take my knowledge and tell myself to avoid certain events or people that are not very good which was painfully obvious but I was too naive.

I’d love to change things and avoid the deep hurts, but I’m afraid of what else might have happened instead. Also, much good happened, so I wouldn’t want to sacrifice that.

You were naive, but you then learned better.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

I’d love to change things and avoid the deep hurts, but I’m afraid of what else might have happened instead. Also, much good happened, so I wouldn’t want to sacrifice that.

You were naive, but you then learned better.

Yeah I wouldn't want to sacrifice the good stuff. And yeah I learned better.

i am so filled with regret. i hate myself. and yet i did the best i could. i would go back and kill myself. there was no possible way i could have done better with what i had at the time.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by the walls

i am so filled with regret. i hate myself. and yet i did the best i could. i would go back and kill myself. there was no possible way i could have done better with what i had at the time.

Glad you did the best you could and glad you didn’t take your life.

honestly I think it would be to depressing. I wouldn't really know where to start. I guess if I was to tell my past self 1 thing it would be enjoy life while you can. it only gets harder

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

honestly I think it would be to depressing. I wouldn't really know where to start. I guess if I was to tell my past self 1 thing it would be enjoy life while you can. it only gets harder

Yeah I can understand that.

[Have Hope]

I also would have said no to my husband when he asked that I co-sign a car lease for him. Now that I want a divorce, this is going to be a nightmare.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

I also would have said no to my husband when he asked that I co-sign a car lease for him. Now that I want a divorce, this is going to be a nightmare.

Oh yeah that will be tough. Unfortunately, from what I’ve heard and read, divorces are always ugly.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by rdgrad15

Oh yeah that will be tough. Unfortunately, from what I’ve heard and read, divorces are always ugly.

Yeah. I was stupid to get married. It was the biggest mistake of my life!!!! What a colossal mistake, and now I am paying for it big time.

[pliepla]

I would yell at my younger me, kick him, and beat him until the younger me would show his parents his middle finger, tell them they should have adopted an engineer instead of having me I would make sure he would pack his things, leave the house and carve out his own path.

After all, studying, working and eventually falling out of a job I loathed (in more than one way) always turns out to be the basis of my mental issues so given the opportunity, I would have done anything to save myself. Even a good beating probably would have been less traumatizing than growning up in the knowledge I should have been somebody else.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

Yeah. I was stupid to get married. It was the biggest mistake of my life!!!! What a colossal mistake, and now I am paying for it big time.

Well I hope things work out in your favor and you can marry someone who truly loves you and supports you.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by pliepla

I would yell at my younger me, kick him, and beat him until the younger me would show his parents his middle finger, tell them they should have adopted an engineer instead of having me I would make sure he would pack his things, leave the house and carve out his own path.

After all, studying, working and eventually falling out of a job I loathed (in more than one way) always turns out to be the basis of my mental issues so given the opportunity, I would have done anything to save myself. Even a good beating probably would have been less traumatizing than growning up in the knowledge I should have been somebody else.

I can understand you wanting to change who you were. I'd make sure I didn't repeat a lot of the mistakes I made too. Not change the course of history entirely. I would still go to the same college, got the same job, meet the same people I actually do like and who treat me well, and everything else. Just would have avoided certain people and events that, at the time, I got the sense wasn't going to be a good idea but I ignored those gut feelings anyway. I'd give myself a beating too. I was a real idiot to the point of embarrassment.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by rdgrad15

Well I hope things work out in your favor and you can marry someone who truly loves you and supports you.

Aw thanks!!! After this relationship though, I’m choosing to be single the rest of my life. C’est la vie!

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

Aw thanks!!! After this relationship though, I’m choosing to be single the rest of my life. C’est la vie!

You're welcome! And nothing wrong with that. I plan on being single myself as well.