Funny school excuse notes

These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling), collected by schools from all over the country.

• My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
• Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
• Dear School: Please exscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.
• Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
• Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
• John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
• Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
• Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
• Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
• Please excuse Ray from school. He has very loose vowels.
• Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the runs.
• Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.
• Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
• Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
• I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wears.
• Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
• Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
• My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.
• Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
• Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
• Mary-ann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.
• Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with the doctor.

LOL, LOL -I can't thank you enough for this post - I'm literally laughing with tears in my eyes and I'm only on the 5th one.

That could sooooo happen at my house. I am always losing track of days. I even went to work on the wrong days. I was on vacation and went to work and found it was my last day of vacation; but the unit was busy with lots of surgeries scheduled and I was already there so I stayed and worked. Silly Yoda.

Very funny stuff. Thanks for the laughs.

I work in a school and so does my mother the best one that we have actually had was

Please excuse my student for the car would not start. The only problem was it was written on the back of a Burger King receipt from 10 minutes before.

The parents are full of excuses!

The best pick up excuse I have had was

I need to pick him up early today because the baby needs to breath oxygen.

Have a good day these are just a few of what I have had.

Doll