Daily Comments #7- Just place to plant your thoughts. No feedback required.

I must say this admitting I have some sort of acne problem and taking pictures of my face to really feel that that I'm really admitting to this problem (it's hard to describe) has made me more confident. As before, I was be shy about my face. Acknowledging the fact that I have skin problem has helped me a lot today. I still beautiful no matter if there are spots or redness. I don't think I have much pimples, it's just red small dots around my cheeks. I hate looking at my face at work, the mirrors expose my face more and plus I know that this grapeseed oil has caused blackheads under my eyes but on my cheek. I'm sure I have rosacea, my cheeks looks red. But hey, I'm getting closer to something... It has taken this long to finally confess that I feel beautiful for once.

The worst thing about distance is that you don't know whether they'll miss you or forget you.

I'm wasting my time with some people. I try to help but I get it straight back in my face. I can't help it if I'm direct and I say what I feel. I'm so fed up now

no! you good person hpychkes!

we like you.

I can't be a good person. I'm nasty

Today is one of those days where I just seriously would rather be (just about) anyone but myself. I don't have these days often anymore. They're not overly enjoyable.

Feeling off.....need to be on.....before I fall back...snap to it....foggy....need fog lights for my head.......demmit

Feeling very tired today. I woke up fixed breakfast and promptly fell back to sleep. Not sure what's wrong. I've been falling asleep sitting up for a few days.

I still have two stuffed animals to doctor up. Guess that can wait, until tomorrow.

Cupcakes were made, but it's late, I'm not staying up all night to make frosting. Wondering about the French Vanilla extract, Raspberry extract or the rum extract((but do I dare go that route with the kids, tehehe ??)) for the frosting flavor...

I am ready to go to college next year because I just want to get out of my comfort zone and explore many places.

I need to call it quits with some people in my life because i feel like i'll be better off.

I know you dont need the advice but Im certain you wont accidentally sew the cake into the remaining stuffed animal patients Dr.

i wish that some of the talents that i used to have, the strengths that i had gained in the past, would be restored to me at this moment. So much has been taken away from me and so much have i missed ever since I have felt I was lonely.

I am ready to kick some people out of my life. All people who are not supposed to be in my life, be gone from my life.

Who's a fan of britney spears? I guess nobody. I mean it's not htat I don't like her. it's just that I have listened to her songs more than once and ever since it has gotten imprinted on my mind that every time when i think about this girl that i used to like her song toxic automatically plays.

for some reason i cannot write my research paper at the moment I am trying to gather as much information as I can so that I can start writing it but the moment something is preventing me from writing. either it's because my head is just overloaded with information or it's just me. I want to know why I can't go on with the next line. I mean, I have been honest this whole time and I have not cheated on any tests or essays ever since i was in middle school. I've come clean about it as well.
writer's block kicks in... i should take a walk or something.

The best thing is to put on a smile and pretend everything is fine. Even my friends are tired of me talking negatively.

I drank some coffee and my face is red. :/ I'm sure it's not the product or the sun. I'm so glad I know what is it rather than feeling down about it.

This reminded me, just this moment, of something I told a co-worker, after being told she was talking 'negative.' (I am an Association Rep-similar to a Union rep)

It's not negative, it's Reality! *hug*

Which reminds me, of this time, I started just matter of fact-ly, discussing my MS illness in therapy.

Come on be more positive, was the impression as the topic was changed. Um...There is no 'mind over matter', when reality strikes.

This is a picture of the area my name is located. Nicks Nose Cove.

i can see how it is with my friends as well.

Desparately lonely.
I could be in a room full of people, talking, socializing...and I would still be totally alone.
I don't know how I got here...I mean I do know how because of my issues with depression, social phobia, pornography, etc etc.
I used to have so many friends, so many activities, be so much fun...but I feel abandoned and alone and useless and worthless.
My kid loves me..that is it. One single solitary soul on this planet actually gives a damn if I am alive or not....just one...and its not even ME.
I should be at church and instead I am here listening to christian music and scoffing at the stories of healing and other peoples rebounds from places very much like I am now.
I am just not much of one for the journey...I want to kneel down and pray and get up and have it all fixed....yeah I know it doesnt work this way.
But right now I am embracing the saddness and despair...I have not been able to cry in ages; I mean I know that I may have cried 5 times in the last 10 months. Usually its just a few tears and then it leaves me.
I don't want someone to hold me and tell me it's gonna be OK.
I want someone to love me, live life with me, have fun with me, walk beside me, and when it counts, let me lead us in the direction we agree we need to go.
I don't even know if such a relationship could exist. I tried it..23 years with the woman I though was going to be my wife for life...but now there us just wreckage and sifting thru the rubble for things we want to cherish.

OK I am done now. I think I got most all of it out. Time to keep on keepin on.

Just my thought but the best thing would be to make everything as fine as possible and knock it off with the pretending

i guess nobody wants to talk to the teenager here, uh? okay.