[Maven]

Hi, guys! I haven't been here in a while, because I never seem to have the time it takes to devote to the boards here that I like to post to (there are several!), but I wanted to peep in and say hi, as well as share some of my updates.

My mom went into the hospital in early October, and is currently in a physical rehab. I'm not sure what's happening when they finally let her go, because she is showing signs of confusion and other mental issues. Even her writing has changed. The Housing Authority sent her an eviction notice for not paying her rent (when she was in the hospital, I called about it, and they said it wasn't due yet, so I didn't think any more of it), so I called to sort that out, and got them a check from her, but she wrote it out wrong (she got the numeral amount right--$324, but the written-out amount was written as if it was "Three hundred and 24/00 dollars," so it looked like the "24" was "24 cents"), so now I have to get a new check from her.

I am just getting over a cold I caught from my boyfriend. I allowed him to share food from my plate to his and vice-versa when we ate out last Friday, knowing he was still getting over his cold, because I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I might have already had it before that (that day, my throat felt a little ticklish), but I pretty much guaranteed it after that dinner.

And here's the big hell I'm having now. Just yesterday, I found out my bank account was compromised. I was not only in a negative balance, but an unbelievable one of hundreds of dollars!!! I have never spent that much money (most of it appears to have been on the 29th of this month) in one day or at one time! So, the lady I spoke with on the phone asked me if I wanted her to cancel my card (hell, yes!) and I'm going to the bank this morning and closing the current account and making a new one. I am supposed to get my Social Security disability this Friday (yeah--tomorrow!), so I'm hoping this all happens fast, because I need that money! I also have a purchase I've been waiting to make, and I'm hoping that isn't put off. I am LIVID about this! I hope the bank takes all those charges off (I have to fill out a bunch of forms, I'm told) and it gets fixed, but I'd also like to catch the BLANKETY-BLANKS that did this!!!

And, finally, HAPPY HALLOWEEN, EVERYBODY!!!

[Gus1234U]

just think, in 5 yrs you'll be laughing about this, i hope ~ so sorry to hear about your mom, and your money,, gads, the 2 worst things to mess with~ hope you get it straightened out ~

best wishes~
Gus

[Me65]

Sorry about your mom. That's so hard. And the bank thing, on the top 10 list I fear most. Get your statements and make sure you insist the purchases made are reimbursed. It's a hassle, but they can track things, the banks just don't want to waste the energy. Tell them you are willing to press charges, regardless of who it is.

[IchbinkeinTeufel]

Oh my God, that really, really sucks about the bank thing; I get very paranoid about that happening, so I tend to take all the precautions I realistically can, online. Try Barklay's, as they have something called a PINSentry, which really adds to security, plus they provide the free, full Kaspersky Antivirus Suite. How much did they take?

Hope things get better for you, and your mother.

[Maven]

Thanks, you guys! I don't know who took my account over, but apparently they were from Oslo, Norway, because there were a bunch of withdrawals and charges from there. I also incurred two overdraft fees ($190 and $2-hundred-and-some) that I'm going to make sure aren't charged to me. The bank was very helpful (so far), and gave me a new account. I've got to wait a few days to get a debit card, and my Social Security is supposed to come in today, but it's not set up with the new account yet. The lady I spoke with was going to take care of that for me, but when she called, it said there would be a one-hour wait, so that didn't happen. I've got to do some things online in the morning regarding my account, but I'm going to call the lady, because I don't know if I have to call the Social Security people or if she's doing that for me.

As for amount, they stole money I literally didn't have! My account overdrew to like -$920!!! Part of that was the two overdraft fees. I have shopped online for years without incident, and now this. While getting the oil changed in my car, I was chatting with a guy who worked there, and he said the same kind of thing happened to his daughter, and this is a frequent problem with Amazon.com and eBay! There's a watch I want to get on eBay, but I don't want my account stolen again. This really pisses me off, because I'm pretty good about avoiding phishing scams and such.

I had a couple hundred dollars left in my account (before the hackers overdrew it), so I want that back, and of course, the overdraft fees removed. I didn't know I could press charges; I assumed that there's no way to track hackers, usually (or it's very hard). But I absolutely would, if they can track down who did it.

I have what's supposed to be one of the top security programs installed on my computer (ESET), but I don't know if they did it by accessing my computer. Most likely, it was from Amazon or eBay. I'll be keeping better track of my transactions in the future, that's for sure.

Don't know what's happening with my mom, but I have to go to a meeting to discuss things. Gotta get that rent check re-done, and sort out if she'll be able to stay in her apartment, and will she be able to stay alone? She really needs help (I do what I can, but my OCD and panic disorder make it impossible for me to live with her, and my boyfriend owns the house, even if I could handle taking care of her), so I've got to see what's what.

I really appreciate your thoughts and comments. Thanks so much!

[kindachaotic]

Really sorry about all your troubles.
Sounds like things are getting sorted, for now, as you say.
I shop on Amazon & eBay, have Paypal acct. & Amazon credit card.
It is scary to think someone could hack into them & do a lot of damage!
We have Idenity Guard, you pay monthly for it.
Hope it's as good as they say it is.

Will keep your mother in my thoughts.
You're not alone on an aging, sick, confused mother.

Take care.

[Maven]

I know any account can be hacked, even with security programs, but it's still annoying when you know you've taken steps to protect your account. So far, though, things are going okay. I'll know more once I've got my new debit card, set up the billing on sites like Amazon, and all that.

Thanks for keeping my mom in your thoughts. I have to talk with some lady at the place she's in, and I think they're going to be telling me she can't live alone anymore. She doesn't want to live in a nursing home, and I don't want her to have to do that, either. I'm hoping maybe she'll accept perhaps some live-in help; problem is, she doesn't want to spend the money. She gets upset if I leave a $2 tip for a waitress. She'd rather it be 50 cents. She doesn't understand things aren't like they were when she was young.

[lizardlady]

Maven, I just stumbled over this thread.

I'm sorry about the hacker and your bank account. Sounds like you are making good progress on getting it straightened out.

Your story about your Mom sounds soooo familiar. You described the last year and a half of my Mom's life. The mental confusion could be signs of dementia, but it could also be related to her medical problems. One of Mom's docs explained to me that in the elderly one medical problem can cause a domino effect with other medical/mental problems. I could tell that Mom was starting to get physically illo when she would start to slip mentally. As your Mom recovers physically her mental abilities might improve.
As for your Mom not being able to live on her own. What about independent living or an assisted living facility? Both are inbetween steps between living alone and being in a nursing home. In both cases your Mom could live alone, or with a roommate if she wants, but would have support from staff in the facility.

I will keep both of you in my thoughts.

[Maven]

Hi, lizardlady! I have to get back to posting in here regularly, again! I miss you and everyone!

The bank account situation is pretty much fixed. I just received my new debit cards (they suggested I sign up for two accounts, one for online shopping, the other for private keepings) yesterday, so I activated them by using them in an ATM, and I just updated my PayPal and sites where I frequently shop (only a couple of places). So far, so good!

Yeah, I'm worried about my mom, but I know there's nothing I can do. Thing is, I don't think she's improving physically at all. She doesn't want to do the therapy and sometimes snaps at the nurses. She prefers to stay in bed all day, although her roommate has her sitting in her wheelchair and hanging out in the hallway, so I guess that's an improvement, although it makes it hard to reach her by phone. Even when she was at home, she was pretty much sleeping all the time.

She fears being put in a nursing home, and has asked me to lie for her. I don't want to do that, and think it's a bad idea. I am hoping she'll consider assisted living, but she doesn't want to pay for it. I don't want her to go to a nursing home, nor does my sister, no matter what she thinks. I am trying to stand up for her and do what she wants, because I don't want someone taking me away from my home or taking my things or my rights away when I'm old. I know it won't keep it from happening, but I am trying to stand by her.

I'll be back in touch in this thread, and hopefully back on the forums soon! Thanks so much for your thoughts!