When someone doesn't respond to your texts and calls

Mini-rant time, and I think I have a good reason: hypocrisy.
Mom, to be specific.
She always gets mad at me when I don't answer my phone after one call from her. But tonight, here I am, waiting to eat dinner (I'm very hungry), and she isn't home from a group outing tonight. I knew she was going to be home late, and I knew she was hanging out with a couple friends she doesn't get to see often, but seriously? ANSWER YOUR ******* PHONE!
I've texted several times and called twice, receiving no answers either way. Hell, I've even emailed once. Still nothing.
This isn't the first time this has happened, either. A few months ago while at Walmart I went off to get a gift for one of my friend's. I picked it out, walked around the entire store once, and called her. She didn't answer.
I proceeded to walk around the store four times and called her several times and she didn't answer at all. I started to have a panic attack.
I ended up finding one of her friend's and together we found her, and she was so embarrassed because she hadn't felt her phone in her purse. And I will bet a million dollars that's what's going on right now.
However, even with that logic in mind, it doesn't stop that tiny voice in the back of my head from chewing on my brain and saying, "Maybe she got in a crash and is really hurt and can't get to her phone maybe there's been an accident and she's dead"
Grr. I just want her to answer me, damn it! Is that too much to ask?

It can be about the most frustrating thing in the world to me when I call someone, really need to communicate with the person, and they don't answer the phone. And yes, eventually I start to worry.

Lol I am the exact same way with my mom!! She will complain and complain if I don't answer my phone...which I admit, more times than not she gets my voicemail...however I always call her back! She on the other hand....ugh...she has call waiting and if I call her when I am at work, because I have an important question, she will never switch lines. And most of the time she will just be chatting with my grandmom, nothing important....most frustrating thing ever!

I so hear your frustration with this. I, in particular, get this from my Mum too and most frustrating is that though she always complains if I don't answer and it perhaps goes to voicemail, heaven forbid, I am in a meeting, appointment, or even an interview as of late, but the kicker is .... she NEVER even turns her phone on! Why she has it, I don't know, but yet continually complains when she can't get someone. Hypocrisy, beyond belief. I feel for you. Maybe we should give them each other their numbers and tell them their ours?

In a similar situation, my mother would simply have told me to fix my own dinner and stop whining. I eventually became a decent cook ;-)

I've been there. That voice chewing away at your brain, chews away at my brain, too, quite often. Unpleasant stuff.

(((JettSet))) Kind of sounds like my mom. She chatises me for not communicating or calling, but I'M DOING the CALLING MOST OF THE TIME. And lately it's all the time.

She says she's "busy". That's her reply when I mentioned it's okay for HER to call too. This is esp. painful since I have a "friend" I haven't spoken to in months cause she's "busy." And she KNOWS I've suffered many losses lately.

I HATE that word now.

Yeah, the hypocrisy of it all....

I get the feeling that you're young and very connected? I get that. Yeah, I have my phone on me most of the day, but the funny thing is that its pretty much a crapshoot as to whether or not I will respond to any given text or message or phone call. My phone is always on silent and I get no notification pop ups. I hate the feeling of being available 24/7, and I think that it is an expected thing in society. Yes, I have my phone for safety reasons, but that doesn't mean I have to be there whenever someone else wants me. Maybe disconnect a bit?

UPDATE:
She was wasted. Ended up spending most of the night in front of the toilet. I was worried SICK. Never seen her this way before.
She apologized profusely the next day, and I accepted it, but reminded her that I do get worried about her and that she needs to pay more attention to her phone
She's fine now. I had to drive us to breakfast that morning because she was starving and nearly passing out. Part of her problem was that she barely ate the day she drank, which explains why she was so intoxicated by 4 cosmos.
So everything is fine.

My mom has many numbers blocked on her phone so that they can't call her, they have to text. I'm one of very few that's allowed.
She usually texts me during the day when she's at work to check up on me once every couple of hours (she's always been very protective and caring) so when she hadn't texted me for 4-5 I took initiative. Several tries later (over a span of two hours) I was worried because I knew she had probably had a couple of drinks. She did drive home wasted, and I am so happy she made it home okay, but still, I thought maybe she had gotten into an accident. So happy that wasn't the case.

I do electronics and like restaurant pager things you take away that light up when they call you a wee pager attached to her jeans or pocket or bag will light up so she knows an incoming call is happening.
Davy

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No wonder you are worried. Maybe time to get some help for your Mum. If she accepts help great. You shouldn't have to be her carer. Is there other family that can help you deal with your Mum?

It's not so much that she isn't answering her phone. that's her prerogative if she did it intentionally but even if that were the case, the part that bothers me the most is that she actually doesn't live by her own standards of expectations of others. That she gets angry with you if you do this, and she is guilty of it herself just makes me SMH.

What does SMH mean? I tried to guess.... Maybe it can't be spelled out?

Shaking my head.