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  #1  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 01:20 AM
Fleury29 Fleury29 is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2012
Posts: 237
Why are people always telling me to do x y z, then complaining about it behind my back?? It makes me mad to realize what I thought of as friendly at the time turns into me with egg on my face. If I complain about it I get told nothing is going on. Yet obviously something is. Why won't anyone deal honestly with me?

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  #2  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 02:31 AM
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lozza89 lozza89 is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 332
just wanted to say I'm thinking of you. I've been in a similar position in the past and it is really hard. hang in there
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~ Rachel Reiland - get me out of here ~
  #3  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 07:55 AM
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Fresia Fresia is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2010
Location: Off yonder
Posts: 6,019
I truly hear and can understand your frustration. It can be maddening.

I have learned that I can either accept people as they are, knowing their faults, working with or around them, and letting it go; or confronting the issue, letting them know how what they did made me feel, instead of stewing on it. If they are a good friend, they will understand and work with you. Life is too short otherwise. I hope you find which brings you peace.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference...
--Reinhold Niebuhr
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I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it. -M.Angelou
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage. -Anaïs Nin.
It is very rare or almost impossible that an event can be negative from all points of view.
-Dalai Lama XIV
  #4  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 08:33 AM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 46,298
At some point, it's ok to not give into their requests. I refer to it as a power play and a catch 22. I've learned by letting go of people pleasing tendencies and it has helped immensely.
Clarity came by way of my ex husband. Couldn't please him to save my life. Which turned into a dangerous situation. But I've certainly grown from that experience. Makes me a better friend, mother, boss, employee and partner.
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