[Medusax]

All comments welcome here, as I am asking for some insight. Long story short, I have a delightful co-worker that loves nature like I do, and is really actually FUN to be around. She is a bit dramatic, but THAT I can handle. What I cannot handle, as I am 100% opposed to such behavior, is her habitual falsehood spewing. She literally says something outlandish about someone each time I see her. Yesterday she told a mutual friend something that has no basis in ANY fact, in ANY capacity. I am a very honest person and I am going to call her on it, hopefully I won't be harsh about it. But, gossip and tall-tale telling are one of my pet peeves when it comes to people. I get the overwhelming urge to wring someone's neck when they do this. Is this a disorder? I would think it is. I would never just blurt out something like; "Sally" snuck out of her house and slept with "Jimmy". The reason I am so violently against it is because twice in my life, gossip and the perpetrators thereof have caused me trouble.Personally, I am a secret keeper. If I actually SAW "Sally" and "Jimmy" doing anything, I would just keep on going and not tell anyone. I have always been this way, so i can't imagine the opposite.

[mctone]

Originally Posted by Medusax

All comments welcome here, as I am asking for some insight. Long story short, I have a delightful co-worker that loves nature like I do, and is really actually FUN to be around. She is a bit dramatic, but THAT I can handle. What I cannot handle, as I am 100% opposed to such behavior, is her habitual falsehood spewing. She literally says something outlandish about someone each time I see her. Yesterday she told a mutual friend something that has no basis in ANY fact, in ANY capacity. I am a very honest person and I am going to call her on it, hopefully I won't be harsh about it. But, gossip and tall-tale telling are one of my pet peeves when it comes to people. I get the overwhelming urge to wring someone's neck when they do this. Is this a disorder? I would think it is. I would never just blurt out something like; "Sally" snuck out of her house and slept with "Jimmy". The reason I am so violently against it is because twice in my life, gossip and the perpetrators thereof have caused me trouble.Personally, I am a secret keeper. If I actually SAW "Sally" and "Jimmy" doing anything, I would just keep on going and not tell anyone. I have always been this way, so i can't imagine the opposite.

Medusax, I have to totally agree with you on this. Telling lies about people (or anything else, for that matter) is just not okay. In fact it's not just "not okay" it's just wrong. Gossip is dangerous! It can cause people who like, and care about each other to hate each other, and cause innocent people to get in trouble for things they had nothing to do with.

I'm not an expert, but I'm going to say that this is NOT a disorder... lying is a disorder... but your reaction is not, at least in my humble opinion.

That being said, if you decide to confront this person, just use kindness. Two wrongs don't 'right' anything, and I have a feeling I don't even need to tell you that. And, this is coming from a non-confrontational person, so I don't know if it's worth much or not; just my feeling. I still believe we should treat others the way we would want to be treated. So before you confront her, ask your self, "If I had done something I shouldn't have, how would I want someone to confront me about it?" I hope you find this helpful

[MickeyCheeky]

I don't know if it's a disorder.. however, if it really bothers you that much, I guess all you can really do is stop talking to her. At least, that's what I think. :/

That is very sad your co-worker resorts to lying and making up stories about other people. I would guess she has no one paying attention to her in her personal life. I could not stand to be around her myself and self-preservation is what my therapist recommends. Her behavior is totally unacceptable and juvenile. I would turn my back on her and not look back.

[VernonJenkins]

I would also avoid this person if confronting them doesn't make a difference... Some people just lack respect for others and it's unfortunate.

OMG she sounds annoying...tbh I wouldn't call this pathological lying. From what I've seen pathological lying is generally where the person tells lies about themselves and usually fairly believable lies also they don't usually do it with the intent to cause discord or drama. In the case of someone telling really grandiose stories the disorder would be something like delusional disorder...But she's just spreading rumors and gossiping about people because she's bored or enjoys causing trouble. Something a lot of teenage girls do but she should have outgrown it a long time ago. I would go to your boss about it and say her behavior is causing conflict in the workplace.

[Medusax]

I should perhaps mention that her mom works there as well and I have heard the same about her.

[VernonJenkins]

Explains where she gets it from

[Medusax]

It is STILL a mystery to me how anyone can do that. Also, she is not the only one. There are several there that do similar things. It drives me insane.

Originally Posted by Medusax

It is STILL a mystery to me how anyone can do that. Also, she is not the only one. There are several there that do similar things. It drives me insane.

Some people just like to cause drama, to put people up against eachother and bring everyone down.

[Turtle_Rider]

Yep, she's not the only one. I used to be best friend with one who is not only pathological liar, but manipulator and scammer too. Sadly, most of her "friends" (or should we call victim), still believe her. I hope they realize soon, especially the ones who she scammed a lot.

I did some research when I investigate her. You can read these for reference whether it is disorder or not:
What is Compulsive Lying Disorder? | Compulsive Lying Disorder
Pathological Lying: Symptom or Disease? | Psychiatric Times
Medicalmattaz: MYTHOMANIA; When Lies Become True To You. . .

Another traits that I realize, they're quite forgetful. Today they said Sally slept with Jimmy, the next day they said Sally is virgin whose Daddy will keep her locked in his castle to protect her with his shotgun. Just ask for evidence or ask Jimmy and Sally for the confirmation. It's amusing to see them try to cover their lies.

Originally Posted by iPhone

OMG she sounds annoying...tbh I wouldn't call this pathological lying. From what I've seen pathological lying is generally where the person tells lies about themselves and usually fairly believable lies

Disagree. The one I know told unbelievable bizarre tales. One of her stories about her house inhabited by ghost of little violinist who murdered after being kept in vacuum room. Every Thursday night the ghost will play sad violin song which made her cry.

Originally Posted by Turtle_Rider

Disagree. The one I know told unbelievable bizarre tales. One of her stories about her house inhabited by ghost of little violinist who murdered after being kept in vacuum room. Every Thursday night the ghost will play sad violin song which made her cry.

Are you sure she didn't actually believe that? I know people who truly believe in ghosts, people who are delusional, and people who just make stuff up to get a rise. So I guess it's hard to tell.

[Turtle_Rider]

Who knows?
No, she is not delusional at all. Some of her lies are still believable.
It's not the full story yet, but just read at it you should think it does not make any sense at all. I mean, vacuum room/chamber in normal residential house? Is her house a science facility?

[Nammu]

Lies and lying seems to be the new normal thanks to trump.

[RubyRae]

Originally Posted by Medusax

All comments welcome here, as I am asking for some insight. Long story short, I have a delightful co-worker that loves nature like I do, and is really actually FUN to be around. She is a bit dramatic, but THAT I can handle. What I cannot handle, as I am 100% opposed to such behavior, is her habitual falsehood spewing. She literally says something outlandish about someone each time I see her. Yesterday she told a mutual friend something that has no basis in ANY fact, in ANY capacity. I am a very honest person and I am going to call her on it, hopefully I won't be harsh about it. But, gossip and tall-tale telling are one of my pet peeves when it comes to people. I get the overwhelming urge to wring someone's neck when they do this. Is this a disorder? I would think it is. I would never just blurt out something like; "Sally" snuck out of her house and slept with "Jimmy". The reason I am so violently against it is because twice in my life, gossip and the perpetrators thereof have caused me trouble.Personally, I am a secret keeper. If I actually SAW "Sally" and "Jimmy" doing anything, I would just keep on going and not tell anyone. I have always been this way, so i can't imagine the opposite.

I used to work with someone like that.At first I believed all the things she said but it became apparent very quickly that she was a pathological liar,about anything and everything.The lies she told became more outrageous as time went by,lies about herself,about other coworkers,even lies about me.They caused problems for everyone.

I started calling her out on them,saying things like "I talked to my kids and they have no clue who you are,I thought you said you knew them well and hang out with them" but all she did was come up with even more lies.And since I was calling her out on them it made her start telling even more lies about me.

The thing is,she was a really nice person and I liked her,but couldn't deal with her dramma and attention seeking behavior.I had to completely avoid her as much as possible and the times I couldn't I learned to not pay attention to anything she said.

If I had it all to do over I would have started avoiding her once I realized how much she lied instead of going through the drama of calling her out on her b.s.

I do think it's a disorder,there has to be something off for someone to lie that much.

I used to have a friend who was a pathological liar.

Of course, in the beginning, I didn't realize it, then I suspected and then I happened to speak to her mom (she lived next door to me), who told me.
We remained friends for a while, and I tried to just accept it about her but lying is something that I'm not tolerant of. Which is my own problem, I guess.

[VernonJenkins]

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

I used to have a friend who was a pathological liar.

Of course, in the beginning, I didn't realize it, then I suspected and then I happened to speak to her mom (she lived next door to me), who told me.
We remained friends for a while, and I tried to just accept it about her but lying is something that I'm not tolerant of. Which is my own problem, I guess.

Why is it a problem to not be tolerant of lying?

Originally Posted by VernonJenkins

Why is it a problem to not be tolerant of lying?

I should have been more tolerant as it appeared as if she couldn't help it...

[Medusax]

We also have a guy down there that is just as bad. I do not know him beyond his name, and I don't know anyone he knows, and vice versa. (I have made it a point to not associate with people around here.) Anyway, according to him, I am sleeping with anything and everyone. An accusation which is so off, it's laugh worthy. Even my husband and I have separate rooms. So............yeah.