Has anyone had success making new friends?

I'm an extravert that's not interested in friends. Most people I used to hang out with are just interested in partying. To a large degree, it was shallow. What is a friend, anyway? At my age, having friends is an odd circumstance. I'm not sure how to describe it......friends, to me, used to mean "fun" (whatever that means). These days, I'm consumed with my family, my job, and other obligations. My life has changed to a degree - what do I do with my friends at my age? Don't get me wrong, I like meeting new people......but on my terms. In my partying heyday, my friend activities used to consist of playing golf, getting high, going to the strip bar, getting drunk, and showing up at home around 3 AM. All in one day - a 13 hour binge. When I decided to change, I had to walk away from that lifestyle and in doing so, I walked away from friends.


I think our life trajectory dictates our definition of friends. To my parents, their friends were mostly those they knew at church. They went to social events, cookouts, and other activities. And you could see the bond they shared with each other. They genuinely cared about each other and they had a lot of fun in the process. I remember one time distinctly when someone in their group was droning on about his diabetes and the treatment he was receiving and someone yelled "No one gives a s*** about your diabetes"! And everyone cracked up. That was the understanding they all had.......life was what it was. And everyone accepted it. These days, people are so uptight about their lives and the things they need to do that it's very difficult to form lasting, meaningful bonds.