[LiteraryLark]

Every time I have a cigarette at work, I spray myself with a really powerful *unscented* odor eliminator I got from the store. I use it at Mom and Dad's and they say it really works, and my boss says he's never noticed a cigarette smell on me. There's a strict policy on not wearing scented products, and this product is terrific for neutralizing odors.

So I had bought four of them, but what I didn't realize was that one said "cool rain". Now, when I spray myself I do a serious heavy dose all over. So I did that, and after I had done it, I realized I reeked of men's cologne, and I smelled strongly of cologne for hours and I had to wash my clothes afterwards! I was so embarrassed!

Luckily the store was nice enough to give me my money back.

[Mountaindewed]

Telling my old therapist I was wearing shapeshifter instead of shapewear. I didn't realize my mistake until I was in the parking lot. I still cringe over that incident 3 years later. Like why didn't she just call me out for my mistake. Other therapists would have made a lighthearted joke about it.

going to the fair and trying to get on a rollercoaster

when I got on, the safety bar wouldn't go down over me (it was a struggle as it is to get on), and the ride operator went.. she's a little.. well, (and he couldn't find the words), so the woman behind turned around said- fat. she's fat. probably eats too many cookies

I struggled off the ride and went to try and win a teddybear in sted

(one of many!). I love this thread.

a couple of years ago I was playing with a baby girl while the parents were busy talking

we played ball, peekaboo, played with blocks, and all of asudden she stopped moving- and I looked at her horrified.

I picked her up and started to rock her in my arms and was like come on leah... I need to take you back to your daddy- are you going to wake up for me?

well, she didn't and I generally felt I'd hurt her.

I went to tell her dad, I think their's something wrong with your daughter- little did I know that she was right behind me right as rain

she was playing hide and seek or something- or pretending to play dead. not funny!

during a bipolar episode, I took 50 pictures of my naked *** and posted them all over facebook.

when it was finished, and I saw what I'd done, of course I took them straight down

I was sent a teddybear in the post that never arived after a couple of weeks

one day I emailed the person who sent it to me, thanking them for the bear, and telling them it was on my bed (I didn't want them to worry)

it was okay, they went along with it- a few weeks later though they emailed me and asked, what's going on?. I've just had the teddybear returned to me. the one I sent to you

I went red in the face. lol

[Brego]

In middle school I got period blood all over my school uniform (I mean huge stain) and so many people commented.


In my psychosis before I urinated all over the porch front step and on the patio chairs out back and on my bed all over it as well as the recliner in the living room. I just sort of wanted to pee there, so I did. In the psychosis I decided to because "no one would know or care".

Originally Posted by Brego

In middle school I got period blood all over my school uniform (I mean huge stain) and so many people commented.


In my psychosis before I urinated all over the porch front step and on the patio chairs out back and on my bed all over it as well as the recliner in the living room. I just sort of wanted to pee there, so I did. In the psychosis I decided to because "no one would know or care".

I've peed in a phone box- and was totally amused when they came and put up the out of order sign

I was 9...

[MaverickLovesYou]

Years ago my cousin visited, wearing a shirt dress & she had a lil "beer belly". I congratulated her on her pregnancy. She gave me the gas face while saying she's not prego. Probably the most awkward moment of my life

[Aviza]

During a psychosis I masturbated on the grass in front of a bank near a roadway that was semi busy. My mom still asks why I would do such a thing. At the time it was so grassy I thought I was at a park.

throwing up over a baby blanket
then realising the baby didn't have aspare one

[Orwellian Nightmare]

Originally Posted by Aviza

During a psychosis I masturbated on the grass in front of a bank near a roadway that was semi busy. My mom still asks why I would do such a thing. At the time it was so grassy I thought I was at a park.

...because masturbating in a park would have been more acceptable?

Anyway I was going to tell my story of having a flat-mate's brother catching me spanking the monkey but I think your story tops even that

Originally Posted by Orwellian Nightmare

...because masturbating in a park would have been more acceptable?

Anyway I was going to tell my story of having a flat-mate's brother catching me spanking the monkey but I think your story tops even that

come on, I wanna know. lol

[MuddyBoots]

My father caught me with two guys separately. But in the same day. And he's never seen either of them before or again after.

Mania during the community college years, eh?

[Mountaindewed]

My mom saw my vibrator on my bed one time and asked what it was and I lied and said it was something that played music and she totally bought it.

[MuddyBoots]

I was skiing on a very crowded day. Now proper ski etiquette is to fill the chair. So if it's a triple a solo skier should pair up with either a pair of skiers or two singles. I was a solo skier and saw a group of two so I yelled out "ON YOUR RIGHT!" as one does. They did not hear me or pay attention. The chair slammed me into one of them, I got on the chair, she did not make it.

[Skeezyks]

Well... there have been LOTS of them over the years. But one, in particular, that comes back to me (from many decades ago when I was a teenager) involves the fact that, as I now realize, I was (and still am... I suppose) what is nowadays referred to as transgender (MtF). As a teen I used to crossdress in my bedroom on a regular basis. But my GID was something I learned very early in life I must never tell anyone about. So no one knew. (I didn't even understand it at the time.)

One evening my father opened my bedroom door (without knocking) to hand me a bowl of popcorn and there I stood dressed from head to foot in some of my mother's old clothes (I was an only child.) Plus, I was wearing a long hair braid I had fashioned from some old black knitting yarn I found somewhere. (My mother didn't knit. So I don't know where it came from.) Anyway... it took some fast thinking to come up with a rationale for why I was dressed the way I was. I told him I was pretending to be a witch! (LOL) He handed me the bowl of popcorn, scowled, said: "Jesus, bud" and closed the door. Nothing more was ever said.

[Brego]

I yelled in the psychiatrist's waiting room, but when I asked if I were in trouble for it they said I never screamed and that I was free to go. Then there was some embarrassed and embarrassing piddle from my mouth.

Originally Posted by Brego

I yelled in the psychiatrist's waiting room, but when I asked if I were in trouble for it they said I never screamed and that I was free to go. Then there was some embarrassed and embarrassing piddle from my mouth.

that reminds me of the time where I woke up all the patients who were trying to rest.

walked up to each individual bed, and shouted... gget up.

I was really having an episode that night, because later I punched a nurse and a security guard- and made my way out in to the carpark, in bare feet, and it was snowing

relating to hospitals, I once threw my entire dinner across the ward

fish splattered everywhere

later I asked: can I have food?

and the nurse said: nope, sorry, had your chance

well I guess she was right

[Orwellian Nightmare]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

relating to hospitals, I once threw my entire dinner across the ward

fish splattered everywhere

later I asked: can I have food?

and the nurse said: nope, sorry, had your chance

well I guess she was right

Vortex, without doubt you need to write a book.
So much material here.

[MuddyBoots]

If we're talking hospital times, during my not eating days they said I could go outside if I drank an Ensure so one of the counselors gave me their coat and the drink. I went outside and went to throw the ensure, and got it all over the counselor's coat. She was PISSED

[AzulOscuro]

Suitcases broken while going out the hotel. A taxi took us to a shop to buy new cases and we had to put all the stuff into the new suitcases in front of everyone in the shop. My dirty panties included. 🙄

[Orwellian Nightmare]

Originally Posted by AzulOscuro

Suitcases broken while going out the hotel. A taxi took us to a shop to buy new cases and we had to put all the stuff into the new suitcases in front of everyone in the shop. My dirty panties included. 🙄

Ummm, how dirty were they, Azul?
Asking for a friend...👀

[Amethyst_Stargazer]

There was a time when my period was so heavy that I had blood on my pants and many people saw it during High School. Many people were laughing about it and never let that go. Here I would think many people would understand, but it turned into a laughing manner. I went the whole year feeling embarrassed and crying a lot for the rest of the School year.