My Benzo Journey and some hope

Angelique67 · Jul 11, 2016, 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mysterious153

Oops, just noticed your location is USA, not California; anyways, I'm not a user (not legal in my state) but I do know someone who says it works better for them than their Xanax.

Thank you for the suggestion. Actually, I should look into that, the legality of medical marijuana here. It seems like maybe it could be legal, but I have to find out.

*Laurie* · Jul 11, 2016, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Yes, I've told him, but not very persuasively i guess.

I hate this phobia because it just hit me immediately around the 3rd week of April. I didn't see it coming, and I had no defense because it caught me so suddenly, and I simply couldn't make myself go up or down. I'm not even really convinced that a benzo would help but it's worth a try. It's a terrible feeling, knowing I'm stuck here in my apartment, even though I do have some agoraphobia too. Just knowing that even if the building were on fire i probably still couldn't get down the stairs.

If a benzo does help, hopefully I'll only need to use it once or twice until my fear is quelled.

Crazy situation.

I'm so sorry you're having to deal with the phobia. I, too, hope that a couple of benzos will help you conquer the fear. I have my fingers and toes crossed for you, Angelique. Keep me posted.

I don't know much about the contemporary types of Marijuana, but I do know that the few times I've smoked it, it caused terrible dissociation (derealization) and anxiety for me.

Angelique67 · Jul 11, 2016, 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LauraBeth

I'm so sorry you're having to deal with the phobia. I, too, hope that a couple of benzos will help you conquer the fear. I have my fingers and toes crossed for you, Angelique. Keep me posted.

I don't know much about the contemporary types of Marijuana, but I do know that the few times I've smoked it, it caused terrible dissociation (derealization) and anxiety for me.

Yes, me too with pot. Even when I smoked an older plant the last time I tried it (in 2004), I still got unpleasantly panicked. When I was a teenager it was my favorite thing haha. Thank you so much for your good wishes for me, it means a lot.

MeditatingMan · Jul 14, 2016, 12:19 PM

Hello Angelique67. I don't have phobias but I can understand the discomfort, anxiety/panic you are experiencing. Don't know if this would help but maybe you could try going up and down the stairs on your bum. This is the safe way people with injuries to their legs navigate stairs. This technique may work if your phobia is one of falling down the stairs but may not help if you're phobia is to the stairs themselves.

Wishing you well.

Angelique67 · Jul 14, 2016, 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MeditatingMan

Hello Angelique67. I don't have phobias but I can understand the discomfort, anxiety/panic you are experiencing. Don't know if this would help but maybe you could try going up and down the stairs on your bum. This is the safe way people with injuries to their legs navigate stairs. This technique may work if your phobia is one of falling down the stairs but may not help if you're phobia is to the stairs themselves.

Wishing you well.

Thank you, Meditating Man. I had planned to do that, get downstairs sitting, but then I still had to get back upstairs. My knees and vertigo make it impossible because I'd have to stand up somehow, on the top landing. I guess I could try holding a floor cushion and kneel on it at the top of the stairs. My knees are in horrible shape.

When I climbed the stairs last Thursday, even with my friend right behind me, i started to panic when I was about halfway through them. If I panicked that much with my friend there, how much worse would it be without him?

Thank you again. I'm just a scared ninny.

brkn2ice · Aug 01, 2016, 01:18 PM

Lost my dad this past week and my anxiety skyrocketed , I want to take the Ativan so badly to help ease my symptoms but I am afraid it will just lead me back to addiction. I am so proud I have been so far able to push through even with all the stress I have right now and really don't want to go backwards but i feel like i am stuck and can't go forward.

Today is hard and I just want to reach for it but I am going to do everything in my power not to.

Angelique67 · Aug 01, 2016, 01:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brkn2ice

Lost my dad this past week and my anxiety skyrocketed , I want to take the Ativan so badly to help ease my symptoms but I am afraid it will just lead me back to addiction. I am so proud I have been so far able to push through even with all the stress I have right now and really don't want to go backwards but i feel like i am stuck and can't go forward.

Today is hard and I just want to reach for it but I am going to do everything in my power not to.

This is my conundrum, being promised a benzo after I've given 3 years in withdrawal from them.

The way you (general you) process new information/feelings etc, is not linear. It can take you to a height, and then let you go, falling back in and having to pull yourself back up. For the most part you are making progress though.

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Angelique67 · Aug 03, 2016, 02:37 PM

Has anyone posted this web site for the best ways to come off benzos? http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/

It can help to give some advice.

brkn2ice · Aug 04, 2016, 02:19 AM

80 days now no benzos.... I am going through some major stresses right now and it's probably the worst time of my life , My anxiety level is through the roof but even with the bottle within reach I was able to keep from taking it.
If I can get through these next few months without the benzos , I can get through anything without them.