[jbug]

I have been missing Steve a lot lately so called his old boss just to say Hi. I haven't talked to her in over a year and figured that maybe talking to her would help. Right after he died I saw her for a few sessions before I quit going to OGC and switched to seeing Dr. M. I loved hearing from Nancy and catching up on what is going on at the clinic and finding out the truth about them going to all groups. It isn't true. I was glad to hear that. She said she wants to see me to see the new me. I've lost about 100lbs since she saw me last. I have finished school. There are a lot of things that have changed since I quit going to OGC. I think that OGC was holding me back a bit and now that I have quit going there I have grown a lot.

Anyway I'm not sure I can go back to the campus of OGC knowing that Steve isn't there. I had problems with that last time and that is why I had to quit going there. I know I need to get over that and I guess this one way to do it is just go there and bite the bullet and see Nancy.

I am just missing Steve a lot lately and wondering what he would think of me now.

Jan

[ECHOES]

I'm sorry you're missing Steve. It was so sudden and unexpected. I think that makes it much harder to come to terms with. I hope you are also remembering your many wonderful times and sessions with him and the good feelings those memories can bring

[jbug]

I am trying to remember those times. I am also trying to remember his reaction to some of the off the wall gifts I gave him like the little furry ball thing I gave him that when you threw it around it made wierd noises. He turned it off because even just sitting on his desk it would make the strange noises. We got a good laugh out of that gift. He told me he took that home to his kids and they loved it. Everytime I bake a batch of cookies I think of him and his love for my baked goods. I would often take him in some cookies, muffins or bread. He thought I trying to fatten him up. I told I was just trying to make him my thanksgiving turkey LOL. Now I wish I could just have those moments back.

Jan

Loss is so difficult, jbug. I'm sorry you lost Steve.

[ECHOES]

I wish you could have them back too.