This time it's forever

When I was 2 my mom took off, leaving me & my sister with my dad. She came & went throughout my childhood, leaving a path of destruction in her wake. I grew up feeling less than human, she abandoned me and I never knew why. The times I spent with her were scarred by her alcohol abuse and subsequent verbal abuse. I still loved her, tho. As I became an adult I gained the understanding that parents are only human, so we developed a mostly healthy relationship and I learned so much from her. We had a good repor. But when I was 25 she quickly picked up & moved 15 hours away, and never visited. Again, abandoned without explanation. But, soon I started calling regularly and our relationship grew again. For 12 years she lived away from me and my sister and her grandchildren. Then when given 3-6 months to live she demanded we bring her home. I got to see her 3 times and she got to meet my twins, and Tuesday morning she went with God, and I feel like I'm 2 again and wonder why she's left me. All is forgiven, and had been long ago, but I'm still a small child looking for hermommy

I am so sorry for your loss! I can honestly say I grieve with you, because I lost my grandbaby 11-18-14. So if you need to cry with someone , I'm your girl! God Bless you! We're here for you!

I am so sorry for your loss. My mother passed in 2006 and I still miss her and think of her everyday. God Bless you and yours and know that your mother is still with you.

I'm just so wounded. I lost my grandfather in 98,he died in front of me and that is still with me, in 08,(10 days short of the 10 year anniversary of his death) my grandmother is taken. Now they were the stability of my childhood, the people who loved me more than anything else, so when mamaw died I was inconsolable. But my mom was only 62 & I still need her, she's been cremated already & I can't find closure. I wake up every day and her death is waiting to remind me that she's gone. How cruel the world can be.

Yes it is! VERY cruel! My grandson was four weeks away from his due date when we lost him. Things in this life just don't make sense, and there's not much one can say that's of any comfort in times like these. All I can say is I feel your pain and I'm so, so sorry! Grief is a hard emotion to deal with and I hate that this happened to you!

I often wonder why some must suffer far more than most. And with that said, why do I suffer so profoundly while those around me are content. Is it free will or fate that dictates the path we take in life? I'd gladly blame destiny rather than admit I suffer because I choose to. But, here at pc, people understand and are so caring. I have so much love for this community. I no longer suffer alone, for that I am grateful.

I was so touched by your post. I am terribly sorry for your loss

Thank you all for taking the time to respond and care. It is deeply appreciated.

I'm so sorry I was very touched by your post

Thank you all so much for your support. I changed my avatar in memoriam that's 16 month old me with my dear momma and my 6 year old sister.

Rest in Peace My Love Always