[Pavlov's Cat]

Sometimes I feel like I'm not really grieving my cat.

I feel like I'm sad about a whole lot of things, including the inevitable passing of time, my own mortality, the fact I live with my parents still, my social isolation, the meaninglessness of life, the fact that my life has no direction right now.

The death of the cat just brings all of that into focus.

I do miss my cat of course, she was a good companion, but I don't think it's just about her. When she was alive I just saw her as a distraction, and I enjoyed taking care of her in her old age. She would've been only about 12 though.

When I miss her, I just have mild sadness. With this grief, I am obsessed with all kinds of thoughts, that have me crying all day.

Mostly I think it's about social isolation I guess, because I feel overwhelmed by loneliness. It's sort of the same feeling when I finished therapy, or finished high school. Feeling alone, and then having to deal with sadness alone, plus the inevitability of loss, makes it all seem overwhelming.

I guess the only solution there is to maybe try and connect more with other people, or find some sort of purpose or a job, so that at least I'm not isolated and aimless if I experience loss again.

Anyone else have any thoughts?

[winter4me]

I think it is normal, when grieving to think of all these things. The social isolation does sound like the major issue---
I don't know you but your attachment to your cat makes me think that you might get some pleasure and some social contact from doing something like volunteering at an animal shelter (where I am there is one that is all cats) or engaging in some other activity that involves animals and sometimes people. (((((((((((((((hug))))))))))) I once had a cat who went with me everywhere and lived to be about 20yo...still think of her sometimes even though it was years (and a few cats) ago.

[CANDC]

Originally Posted by Pavlov's Cat

Sometimes I feel like I'm not really grieving my cat.

I feel like I'm sad about a whole lot of things, including the inevitable passing of time, my own mortality, the fact I live with my parents still, my social isolation, the meaninglessness of life, the fact that my life has no direction right now.

The death of the cat just brings all of that into focus.

I do miss my cat of course, she was a good companion, but I don't think it's just about her. When she was alive I just saw her as a distraction, and I enjoyed taking care of her in her old age. She would've been only about 12 though.

When I miss her, I just have mild sadness. With this grief, I am obsessed with all kinds of thoughts, that have me crying all day.

Mostly I think it's about social isolation I guess, because I feel overwhelmed by loneliness. It's sort of the same feeling when I finished therapy, or finished high school. Feeling alone, and then having to deal with sadness alone, plus the inevitability of loss, makes it all seem overwhelming.

I guess the only solution there is to maybe try and connect more with other people, or find some sort of purpose or a job, so that at least I'm not isolated and aimless if I experience loss again.

Anyone else have any thoughts?

For me the death of a person or the ending of a relationship reminds me of my own end in this life cycle of birth and death. It seems there is wisdom and compassion I can awaken within myself.

So I have my routines and my activities that bring me to people. Having a job can help especially if money is something needed to pay the food and rent. Sometimes the job can also be a place we socialize.

Online activities can also be a way to socialize. There are many wayts to get where we hope to be.

@CANDC

[Pavlov's Cat]

Originally Posted by winter4me

I think it is normal, when grieving to think of all these things. The social isolation does sound like the major issue---
I don't know you but your attachment to your cat makes me think that you might get some pleasure and some social contact from doing something like volunteering at an animal shelter (where I am there is one that is all cats) or engaging in some other activity that involves animals and sometimes people. (((((((((((((((hug))))))))))) I once had a cat who went with me everywhere and lived to be about 20yo...still think of her sometimes even though it was years (and a few cats) ago.

I plan on volunteering at the shelter asap.

[winter4me]

Enjoy! Let us know how it goes.

[Pavlov's Cat]

Originally Posted by winter4me

Enjoy! Let us know how it goes.

I might not be able to officially volunteer at the cat shelter, so in the meantime I will volunteer on an ad hoc basis. They want people to come in and handle the cats so they are socialised.

Or I will just end up volunteering somewhere else. Or both.