grieving family I won't ever have *triggers*

This is a little different than everyone, but I have been emotionally abused by my mom and sexually and emotionally abused by my brother. I have finally seperated from them for good. I have finally realized that they will never be kind, understanding, or even decent to me. I am grieving for the 'normal' family I'm never going to have. They blame me for being hurt and saying 'enough'. They are so angry that I broke ties. I can't understand how they can hurt me for so long, then not 'understand' when I finally have to leave to literally save my life. They were pushing me too close to the edge, and I was about to slip over. I had to leave. I will never go back. I can't. I am in so much pain. Pain from the abuse, pain from having no family. I have tried every drug out there. I have tried councelling. I am so tired of fighting. Will it ever get better? It's not fair, they hurt me and I'm the one in pieces, meanwhile they go merrily along. Life sucks.

((((yruloud)))) I'm so sorry that you are hurting. You are right. Life does suck sometimes. You are allowed to feel that pain, but please know that you are taking steps to make yourself better and that is awesome!!!

Just getting an 'atta boy' once in a while sure does help! Thanks!

I think you should keep trying therapy. I had that kind of sucky life until my 30's and therapy from 1970-2005 but it finally all worked out because of the good therapy help. Find some good support/a good therapist and it can get lots better, even if only slowly.

(((hugs)))) if you would like them....

I think... that there are many of us that mourn the "family that we never had or perhaps will have"...

I know... I certainly have.. mourned.. and mourned.... because I came from a family of abuse...

I am well into my 50's... and I can say "yes".. IT SUCKS... and "yes".. it does heal... the pain fades..... never completely going away I don't think...but... gets much better....

I too, came from an abusive home. It took years to recover as well as I have. May I suggest adult children of alcoholics? You don't have ;to come from an alcoholic home to be welcomed there. It is for recovery from dysfunctional childhoods. Saved my life!
zoeo99

It can get better with time and therapy and goals. The hard part if not to get stuck in it and not move foward. meaning to just let the abuse keep reminding you of itself and the not talking about it or trying to process it that is stuck. If you can talk about it go to therapy Journal about it. Set goals for yourself that are realistic and can be modified if needed.