[Elysium]

I am very Obese...my BMI is over 50. I'm 33 years old and I hurt all over...all the time. My fingers hurt when I bend them, my feet hurt, like they're broken, my knees and shoulders...they all hurt.

I most likely have Fibromyalgia. I haven't been formally diagnosed but have talked with an MD about it and they say that the symptoms sound like it. There's also a chance I may have something called CRPS (Chronic Reflex Pain Syndrome) and I am following up with this this month.

I had a Gastric Lap Band placed in January of 2006. I lost 100lbs in 8 months. Most of my physical pain went away and I was able to breathe easier, get off my meds, and exercise daily. I felt better about myself and my self esteem improved.

Since then, I've gained all the weight back and more and am now pushing 330lbs. What happened? I wasn't as prepared as I thought I was for the rapid weight loss and the inability to use food as my main crutch and coping skill. At the time, I didn't know that I had DID. After the surgery, my alters started coming out more and I didn't realize it and I started self harming and then I couldn't hold onto the weight loss.

Anyway...I really want to have the Gastric Bypass. I'm beginning to do some research on it and start the preparation process. I talked with T about it and she is supportive but concerned. She says that all of us (alters) need to be able to be on the same page and cooperate with the weight loss plan and work hard to utilize our other positive coping skills especially during the initial weight loss.

I am really scared that if I don't do this and change the way I am eating and get myself to a place where I can exercise more to stay healthy that I'm going to die. It's so hard to move. I'm out of breath all the time. I had to run at work the other day to protect a patient and I almost fell because as I was running it felt like my knee was going to give out and my hip started to pop.

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else here has been down this road, or a similar road?

[perpetuallysad]

((((Elysium)))) I just wanted to tell you that I think you are so brave to bare yourself like this. I'm very proud of you. I've gained a lot of weight since I've started meds, but not enough to qualify for surgery. I'm a chicken though and I don't think I have the courage to do it. I will support you the most I can through this online world. Again, I am incredibly impressed with your ability to be so honest and open.

[shezbut]

(((Elysium)))

I haven't been down that road. I just wanted to offer you a hug and praise your honesty in reaching out for camraderie!

It's been a year since I worked, but I was a CNA and have taken care of several people in that category. Complications quickly and easily do come up. Gastric bypass surgery is usually only done on people that will carry through with the permanent diet.

The diet restrictions are huge ~ an RN that I worked with had the surgery. It was a huge success for her! But, she would eat one half of a peach and be completely stuffed! The daily diet was just that: a cup of yogurt here, a couple hours later, a few bites of lean meat and small veggies, a couple hours later, something else very small, etc. She lost weight very quickly and felt much better. That very small diet must continue though...even when a person feels a little happier with their physique. And that's the trick. Staying focused on eating in that new way for the rest of your life.

I don't know much at all about DID and the ability to make commitments like that. I don't know if it's possible. Perhaps getting a dietician and/or physical therapist could help you lose weight more easily and permanently. If you can commit to their recommended changes for X amount of time, your doctor/s would probably be more supportive in the decision to have gastric bypass surgery.

Very best wishes to you!

[lynn P.]

((Elysium)) - I also wanted to give you support and credit for revealing your problem. I agree you certainly need to do something effective to make yourself healthy. I don't have a weight problem - in fact when I was younger I had to make an effort to keep wait on lol. I didn't like being 20 yrs old, 5'6" and only a 100lbs.

I do know alot about healthy eating and exercising though. When my mother had several strokes and later died from it, I learned how to eat healthy - not to look better but to avoid the same crippling strokes she had.

You're a smart lady and I'm sure you and your doctor will make the right decision. It seems like you know the important psychological connection to weight. Even famous stars who had it done, struggle when they haven't linked the emotional/psychological and just treated the physical part. Best of luck Elysium.

[Elysium]

Thanks for the support you guys...

It's nice to finally have medical insurance again with my new job. It's real scary being without it. You don't recognize how stressful it really is worrying about your health until you get your insurance back and you feel the relief.

I have an appointment to meet my new Primary MD at the end of April. Since I haven't had medical insurance in over a year, I have made a list of things I want to follow up on; things that have needed following up for some time. I'm going to talk with her about having the Lap Band to RNY conversion (Gastric Bypass). My insurance offers a class/support group for the surgery but you need to be referred by your MD.

Being that I have had the Lap Band placed and I have the experience of working with the Nutritionists and Physical Therapists, I feel I have a head start on the surgery.

I'll keep you all posted. Hopefully I will be able to have the procedure done sometime this year.

[jbug]

I've had gastric bypass and have lost almost 240 pounds. I feel great. I had a tummy tuck and have had some complications from that but I brought those on myself.

I don't know how the gastric bypass would work on someone with DID but I say give it a shot. If you have any questions about the surgery itself feel free to PM me.

Jan